Lemons and Roses

Moved Again...

2010-03-16T19:06:00.001-06:00

The Mrs. Adventures of Button Girl ...Join me will 'ya?

Moving...

2009-10-26T10:36:00.003-06:00

Um, maybe not the move you're thinking of. Lemons and Roses has moved to Wordpress. Here's the link. I think I'm pretty excited. There's not much up there yet and I'm still working on my Blog roll and such but I think I like it better already. Things will stay put here indefinitely, although I intend to move it over at some point. So, sayonara Blogger, you've served me well. Hello new beginning.

Weekend

2009-10-22T11:35:00.004-06:00

Rough week. But I'm thankful to be done with it. There are some things that I just can't do anything about and I have to be ok with that. The bottom line is that God is my strength. I will find strength in no other place and His word is true.

We (actually mostly me since Travis was sick) watched our friends kiddos this weekend while their parents are in India picking up their newest daughter. We were really just giving their aunt and uncle a break because they've had them for a week. We had pizza and ice cream, watched movies and played video games. They ran around outside playing "melt" tag; it's like freeze tag only you melt onto the ground when you're tagged. The only agenda for the time they were here was to have fun. Mission accomplished. It was a bit stressful at times but I really felt honored that I could be a small part of helping them while they're picking up their daughter. I even got to talk to them for a bit while they were there via a video chat. Not that the point of that was to talk to me but I took the kiddos back to their aunt and uncle's house so that they could see and talk to their parents and little Dorothy. I was able to say "hi" and tell Dorothy that she's beautiful. She just stared at me but that's ok. It was still very cool. And yeah, this kid is gorgeous. I can't wait to really meet her.

Then Sunday was spent mostly cleaning in between lying on the couch. Travis was better but not completely and I think I have a little touch of what he has. Which when you think about it is a miracle. I usually get whatever anybody has but worse, so for that I'm really thankful.

And now I'm going to take Amanda to work. I've been working on this post for 3 days but have been interrupted a lot. So here you go and I'll post more later.

October

2009-10-20T10:50:00.002-06:00

I love October. I usually hate it because I'm hiding the kids eyes from scary decorations at the mall or at various other stores. But it's not bothering me so much this year. I'm not sure why. Fall is in full swing here and the temperature is beautiful. We actually had freezing temps a couple of nights this weekend. And I love it.

We went to the park last night for family night. We only had about an half hour before the sun set and we spent our time holding Chloe up and pushing her around on her "new" garage sale find, roller blades. We did actually go garage sale shopping the weekend before last. And I did find some cool things. Besides Chloe's roller blades (they're probably Barbie, I can't remember) I also got a computer desk for $5 (painting project to follow) and brand spanking new running shoes for $15. A guy in a subdivision down the street from us is a sales person for Adidas and had all manner of brand new shoes for really cheap. I was going to buy the same shoes in a different color from Costco but they were $22 dollars more. So I was willing to have purplish trim instead of turquoise. I was also given a piece of art with the desk. The owner just wanted to get rid of it and being the creative soul that I am, I thought I could do something with it. I'm still thinking about it but it may end up at Goodwill. It reminds me of Frank Lloyd Wright but Amanda says it looks "so 80's". We'll see.

I'm contemplating some changes. Not huge ones but maybe blog ones. It's the things that are going on here plus health problems that my dad is having that make me wonder what I write for. I originally did this to keep in touch with family and friends that are far away. So that people could see pictures of the kids and hear the funny stories that you miss when you live far away. Occasionally I'm willing to post deeper thoughts but what's it for? I'm not super-inspirational-has-all-the-answers girl. There are enough blogs out there that do that. And I guess I'm just really sad when I look back at the things that I've written. How hopeful I've been in the midst of everything and not realizing why things were so tough. It seems like a lie. I'm tired of lemons and most of the roses I've been given were tools of manipulation (ex-boyfriend). I think I'm tired. So do I just put on a game face and keep going? Post about cooking and decorating and cute kid stuff and forget about everything else? An escape because I like writing sometimes? I'm not so good at a game face. I feel like a phony and I hate feeling like that. Do I scrap it all and start over? Maybe. I can't really imagine not having a blog. I know I can't just leave it hanging out there undecided, that would drive me nuts. I don't feel to weird writing all of this since there are only about 2 people that read my blog anyway. So I'll decide something relatively soon I think. Until then, I'll enjoy reading your blogs and listening to your lives.

Three Years...

2009-10-13T17:38:00.003-06:00

I just realized a little while ago that today is the third anniversary of us closing on our house. It was Friday the 13th, 2006. I laughed when I found out what our closing date was and wasn't superstitious...but now...hmm. Things have definitely changed a lot and some things haven't changed at all. I don't think we even thought we'd still live here at this point. It is funny how time flies when you buy a house as opposed to renting. When we were renting we always felt under the gun because it seemed like our lease was always about to expire.

The girls have changed a lot since then. Chloe was 5 and halle hadn't turned two yet. Last night they were trying to wrestle and it made the house feel so very small. I wish they were still this little.

This is what the eat-in area in the kitchen looked like...man, that was a lot of scraping. Please remind me to never buy a house with wallpaper again.

And the kitchen...blech. The only thing that's really changed is the wall color, the floor and the island. I really thought I'd have the cabinets painted by now. I really, really don't feel like doing it. I even have all the hardware...but I still can't seem to make myself do it.

The floors...the wallpaper...the window...it's kind of hard to believe we bought it like this. We had no idea what we were in for.

And the bathroom. I would have put money on us having replaced everything by now. Ah, the naive first time home buyer. And so concludes our tour of our house three years ago. Even though it's been frustrating to live with all the repairs and remodeling, I'm still thankful that we live here instead of an apartment. And our life is much richer for other things, like being closer to our church and the people that are walking life out with us because we're here. So maybe I'll go bake some anniversary chocolate chip cookies. That'll be my excuse anyway.

The Swing of Things

2009-10-12T15:53:00.002-06:00

It's funny that even though autumn is my favorite season, I don't have a lot of decorations for it. Come to think of it, I don't really have a lot of decorations for any season. I'd like to have different wreaths for seasons but I never get around to it- or to be more precise- my wallet can't handle buying one and I haven't found any budget friendly flowers and such that don't look cheap. So I mostly decorate with color or plants. Not a lot, but enough for me to know that it's there. I bought these bud vases last year with the intention of putting cranberries inside with a taper candle in each. That plan was thwarted by an unexpected visit to my parents for my grandmother's funeral. So today I put that plan into action with a filler that's less smushy- as in- I can't smoosh them. That's also probably close to my last tomatoes. The plants still have green tomatoes on them but we're getting cooler and cooler at night so they won't last much longer. Which is probably good because Travis is getting tired of eating them...because he didn't like them that much to begin with. Live and learn. Next year it will be red tomatoes.

Here You Go

2009-10-09T20:28:00.002-06:00

Mary suggested that I crop the photo of the church...I rarely think of that. So here you go. I'm wishing there were no power lines and that they didn't have that outside light on but, oh well. I still like it. Now if it was just in focus...

Moving Forward

2009-10-09T08:59:00.004-06:00

I think that I don't know how to say this well but in essence my attitude is one of moving forward. I don't really know how to do that but I do know that it's Autumn, my favorite season, and I intend to enjoy it. I can't pretend that things aren't what they are but I can choose to go forward in spite of it.

For instance, Chloe, Halle and I had a ceremonial lighting of our Autumnal candle a few days ago. Silly? Yes, definitely. But it's those silly little things that my kids are going to remember and will do with their kids. It wasn't anything more than me excitedly saying "Girls! Are you ready for the ceremonial lighting of our Autumnal Candle"?!?! to get them jumping around looking for the lighter. Which we all held and lit the candle at the same time. Actually, I can make anything fun if I say it like it's going to be so.

And did you notice my baby pumpkin? Once again I haven't gotten a full-sized pumpkin out of my pumpkin patch. It rained for what seemed like the entire month of September. And while initially the rain was good for the pumpkins, eventually they got too soggy and the vine aborted another smaller pumpkin. So I cut this one loose before the vine could abort it. The pumpkin body count this year is 2 dead and 1 small pumpkin made it. There is actually one more small, small pumpkin growing out there but I don't hold out much hope for it. I will probably do something silly like cover it with a blanket when it's cold outside just to give it a fighting chance. Because, well, it's what I do. I'm not sure I'll try growing them again- although it's pretty darn addictive once you try. It's one of those things that you think "if I just did these things differently I'd have 40 pumpkins"! We'll see.

I had several pictures in my "brain queue" to post about. Then the "train wreck" happened. But it doesn't make these things any less special to me. So these should have been up about a month ago but I'm posting them anyway.

I love, love, love the front doors of this church. I don't even remember what kind of church it is, it's just one of four within about a two block radius here. There are some architectural things that I just love and these types of doors are one of them.

Chloe had her mile run a few weeks ago and she finished in about the same time as she did in the spring. But she didn't have a running buddy. I plan on being her running buddy next spring. When I was walking yesterday I did jog just a teensy little bit- maybe a 1/4 mile total- but I don't feel sick today. I'm thinking that I could jog a mile by April. Chloe does much, much better with a buddy.

The beginning of September we decided to go for a walk. But the weather was seriously not cooperating. We decided to drive for a bit to see if we could out-smart it and ended up in Leiper's Fork. It just so happened that they were having an outdoor jazz concert. So we found a porch swing on the front porch of the local art gallery and swung for a long time, listening to jazz and talking to each other. Chloe and Halle decided to tell jokes, which were only funny because they're cute. Then we walked for a bit. A really little bit because Leiper's Fork is really small. I loved the contrast of the white church against the angry sky. I just wish it hadn't been evening service time. There is much more going on- like a bedroom remodel- that I'll show you pictures of later. I also fully intend to make caramel covered apples (thanks to a recipe from my new Food Network Mag) and to make the front stoop (I really don't know what you call the front if you have stairs but no porch) very autumnal. I feel like I'm behind on that, which is a bummer because I love it so much. And I'm going to enjoy coffee, and little girls giggles, and the leaves changing, and my being-restored health. And I'm going to breathe...and live...for the first time in a very long time.

Catching My Breath

2009-10-07T09:52:00.003-06:00

The last two and a half weeks have been crazy. And for the most part they've also been very unpleasant. Has is only been two and a half weeks? The great train wreck of 2009 and then Dad's surgery have left me tired emotionally but it's also put God's grace at the forefront of everything. I heard Him say two weeks ago "I'm bearing the brunt of this for you". And He certainly has. I would not have gotten through this without Him. So where are we? I know that we're in a much better place now than we were three weeks ago. I kept hearing God say that our anniversary was a new beginning for us...and He was right. It just didn't happen the way I expected it to.

We didn't go out of town like we wanted to. Thankfully the place we rented not only has reasonable rates but they also have a generous cancellation policy. So we can go any time during the next year and we'll have a credit of what we already paid. I was bummed that we weren't going and I felt like I was being punished but I had to put that aside and be thankful that we were spending our anniversary together. Honestly, I couldn't have done that myself. I have a bad habit of pouting when I'm really looking forward to something and then it doesn't happen, so I'm just going to give God the credit for that.

We did have a wonderful night though. We went to the Olive Garden for dinner and though I've been sort of anti Olive Garden it was really nice (how can you be ok with the Olive Garden when you've been to Ellendale's?). We had appetizers and the most fantastic glass of wine ever to cross my lips, a really nice entree and we took a slice of pumpkin cheese cake with us. I really couldn't have eaten another bite. I highly recommend that you high-tail-it to the Olive Garden if for no other reason, for the pumpkin cheesecake...mmmmmm.

Then there was a surprise. Travis told me to take a change of clothes since I was all dolled up for dinner. He said my jeans and tank top that I'd been wearing would be fine and that I should take tennis shoes. I thought we were going hiking. I was wrong. No, he was taking me to Arrington Vineyard. If I'd known that I wouldn't have taken a tank top and flip flops (I forgot the tennis shoes), I would have dressed a little nicer. But the new Amy decided to just go with it. When we got there I was wearing a dress and 4 inch heels- you can't walk in the grass in those. So I slipped my jeans on under my dress, no problem. The problem was that there were people parking all around us and I couldn't get my shirt on. Ok, I can do this, glad to have an enormous mini van. I slinked to the back and laid down in the back seat, unzipped my dress and tried to get my head out the side (it's one of those side-zipped dressed). And well, my hair got caught in the zipper. So I was laughing and saying ow, ow, ow. Then I started to get a crick in my neck and laughed harder...hahaha...owowow...haha..owow. But I finally managed to get undressed/dressed, slip into my flip flops and head out to the vineyard.

We had a nice time not drinking wine because we'd already had some. I really don't do well on more than one glass of wine. We swung on a swing hanging from a tree limb and enjoyed the cool but humid air. We enjoyed some live music and walked to the car in the rain. The people that worked there thought it was very romantic...and it was.

And the ring? Well, it's big and purple and gaudy and I wasn't even sure why I wanted it so much but I really did. I showed it to him weeks ago and said I really, really, really want this ring. It's an amethyst set in silver and I just fell in love with it. I finally realized that I liked it so much because when I was a kid my parents took us along with our grandparents to go "gem mining" in the smokies, I think. They came away with a handful of rough gems that weren't worth much but I loved looking at them. I'd ask my Mom from time to time if I could look at the gems and she'd patiently go over each one and tell me what they were. This stone reminds me of that. And it reminds me of us. Imperfect but beautiful.

Hello There

2009-09-30T20:15:00.002-06:00

Um, so hi, how are you? It's been a bit since I've been around and, well, there just isn't anything I can do about it. I thought I should give you all a bit of an update since some pretty important things are happening.

First of all, our anniversary was fantastic. We had a beautiful dinner and a surprise visit to Arrington Vineyard, we walked in the rain and just enjoyed being together. Travis bought a ring for me that I really, really, really wanted. It's not a super-expensive ring but it's pretty and it has a story, like most meaningful things do. I'll have to share that and pictures later. Because I'm in Birmingham, using my Mom's computer and I'm not going to upload pictures here.

My Dad had knee surgery Monday and while the surgery went fine and his therapy was going really well, he's had some issues today. He hasn't been feeling well and we thought that it was because of the medicine he's on but apparently they cut his therapy short today because of some chest pain. They've done some tests and they don't know yet if his heart issue is because of his surgery or if it's an underlying heart problem. My Mom is there tonight and Travis and Amanda will be coming here in the morning. I really need him for emotional support and to help with the girls. The hospital isn't exactly a great place for them to hang out. So I can leave them at Mom's with Travis while I go do whatever my parent's need for me to do.

So, I'm looking forward to not being drama-Button-girl soon. Trav has been hard at work in our room and I want to show you guys some pictures of that soon. The work had to be cut short because he's coming here now but I'll just say that for the first time in 3 years we have a bedroom door that opens and closes properly. I'm happy about that and I'm also very happy about the weather. I love autumn and I can hardly wait to make some autumn goodies. Mmmm.

I Couldn't Say it Any Better

2009-09-21T21:02:00.001-06:00

Isaiah 38:16-20

16 Lord, your discipline is good, for it leads to life and health. You restore my health and allow me to live!
17 Yes, this anguish was good for me, for you have rescued me from death and forgiven all my sins.
18 For the dead[j] cannot praise you; they cannot raise their voices in praise. Those who go down to the grave can no longer hope in your faithfulness.
19 Only the living can praise you as I do today. Each generation tells of your faithfulness to the next.
20 Think of it—the Lord is ready to heal me! I will sing his praises with instruments every day of my life in the Temple of the Lord.

Praise the Lord!

Whiplash

2009-09-18T09:46:00.003-06:00

I'm sure I'm not the only one like this but if I haven't had any grown-up talking time in a while and it's been an eventful day and Travis comes home, I just start rattling things off rapid-fire until he says "Amy, hold on, you're giving me whiplash". You never do that, right? I'm going to try to not do that to you today, K?

I am doing much better physically. I was frustrated a couple of weeks ago because I was back in the spot where I couldn't do anything without ending up in bed for, well, a long time. But I have a strategy and it's really working. I was in church a couple of weeks ago (I've actually been to church 3 weeks in a row. That hasn't happened in a very long time.) and the Lord said, "I'm walking you out of this". That was exciting. And literal. I'm walking now. Not power walking, just plain old walking. As I was praying one day the Lord told me that if I walked it would strengthen my immune system. He's actually been telling me that for a while and I was being so stubborn about it. I don't like walking. But I *really* don't like being sick. I'm also taking mega doses of vitamin C and vitamins. It's so simple and I've made it so hard. Walking isn't that bad. The rain has hindered me a bit this week but I'm going to try to get out there today.

And speaking of rain, it has poured here all week. It's not usually blog worthy but have you other Tennesseans noticed that it's made the hills around here look like the Smoky Mountains? How I wish I had a camera that could capture that sort of thing. I've just noticed those plumes of steam coming up from the hills that surround our house. It is beautiful.

And speaking of the Smoky Mountains, Travis and I are going there next week!!! It's our 10th anniversary and we really wanted to go out of town. I really wanted to go hiking and initially thought we could stay at Fall Creek Falls and go hiking. I've wanted to go back there forever but haven't been able to for one reason or another. So I made a reservation but they only had availability for one night. We really wanted to stay for two. Then I remembered a place that we'd stayed at in Gatlinburg about 3 years ago. The rates were reasonable and we spent a lot of time in Gatlinburg for our honeymoon. I called and they had a vacancy for the two nights we wanted and she gave me a discount because we'd stayed there before. So we actually would only be spending a tiny bit more for staying the second day. My parents are going to be picking up the girls for us next week and they'll take them back to Birmingham. Then we'll go to B'ham and stay for my dad's knee replacement on that Monday. Then I'll stay for the week and chauffeur my mom around and help out with whatever they need. The timing of everything worked out perfectly.

And speaking of pumpkins...I didn't mention pumpkins? Oh, silly me, I will now. I have two growing pumpkins as we speak. One of the pumpkins rotted on the vine because I got a little too happy with some pruning shears. But it looks like I'll have two little pumpkins as long as I get them off the vines before a frost. I read a quote last night that said "to be a successful farmer, grow pumpkins". Really? Maybe I'm just over thinking it or something but I don't consider my last two tries at pumpkin growing to be that successful. Powdery mold freaks me out and it kills the leaves on your plants. After all the wonderful rain we've gotten my plants are completely afflicted with it. I was going to show you pictures but my camera is dead. I love it but one of the most infuriating things about it is that it doesn't show that the battery is low until it's nearly dead. So pictures will come later.

Other fun stuff...Amanda has decided to move out- in six months. Or rather, she wants us to move out so that she and some friends can rent this place. Really? Travis and I laughed. I do think it's a good idea for her to move out though. Not in an "I can't wait to get rid of this kid" sort of way. But I know her and this will be good for her. She needs to know what it's like to pay bills and buy food and cook. As of right now she knows how to save money but she doesn't realize how much everything costs. She'll be nearly 20 in 6 months and I think it's going to be a very good, growing experience for her. We'll see how that goes.

And more good stuff...

Travis was asked to be one of the lead characters in the kids Christmas play this year. He's pretty excited about that. It's a big role with lots of lines which makes him happy. It's not Shakespeare but he does get to do anger at one point and I think that's always exciting for an actor.

And even more good stuff...

I've talked to some of you about this already but Chloe is having the most fantastic year at school that she's had since kindergarten. Her reading has skyrocketed and she's very, very happy. Her teacher has given dubbed part of the room her "Chloe corner" and she gets to sit by herself and read whenever there's free time in the room. If you know Chloe at all, you know how much that has meant to her. She really "gets" Chloe. And I am thrilled.

Is your neck hurting yet?

Hiatus

2009-09-16T08:50:00.004-06:00

So, maybe you noticed, maybe you didn't, but I've taken a bit of a hiatus in computer land. It's nothing tragic or crazy, I'm not having a breakdown, I just wanted to unplug for a while. No Facebook, no blogs, no incessant checking of the million little things there are to check out each day. And it was really nice. I found that I started thinking more clearly. I was less distracted. I felt more engaged in my life. And I found out that I still don't have time to do all the little things that I have to do during the day. Hmmm. I still intend to blog and to read your blogs (I did check-in to make sure that Christy's little nephew was doing ok) but I plan on spending less time in general on everything computer related.

Things here are really, really good. I've taken stock of my life during this last year and I think that I'm more content and happier than I was this time last year. I've taken a really hard look at some things and have faced my past and my fears and I realize that who I was doesn't define who I am. I used to think that was the case but it's not true. My past nearly destroyed me. It made me a hard, tough person- I used to think that it made me strong. But Christ and my life in Him defines who I am. My strength is in Him and He has made me softer, more loving and compassionate. I've come to some conclusions about some things that we could talk about over coffee sometime. And I'm looking forward to a new season for us as a family, for me personally and am thoroughly enjoying life today. It's funny how God's method of completing you is by stripping everything away. Then He rebuilds it. I'm looking forward to that.

A Bloomin' Miracle I Tell 'Ya!

2009-08-28T10:29:00.004-06:00

I'm not sure what's happened with Halle lately but she loves having her picture taken. It's been a long time coming. Her sisters have never had to be coached, asked or prodded to have their pictures taken but Halle, well, she's just Halle. Yesterday she begged for blueberry crisp and I let her have some and this is the result. She always ends up with food on her forehead. I don't know how she does it but it's extremely cute. And last night she asked to have her picture taken while she was dancing in the living room. I'm really happy to see her personality come out. To "bloom" if you will.

And this morning at 7 o'clock I looked outside (I was quite groggy) and saw that my pumpkin had bloomed! And it was raining. And I didn't trust the bumble bees to do their work so I had to take it upon myself to make sure this pumpkin happens- you know, fertilization. So I put on my tennis shoes (I was maybe grumbling just a bit- or maybe a lot) walked out into the rain and ripped the leaves off of one male bloom, took out the stamen and dropped it in the female bloom. And then I did it again. I was in such a hurry to get out of the rain that I wasn't sure if I'd done it right the first time (plus I don't think I was thinking clearly). Not that it's a big deal, there are probably 10 blooming male flowers and 1 female so it's not like I was messing it up. And apparently that's how much I love pumpkins. I guess you can call me farmer Amy- that sounds ridiculous. I'm a bit concerned because autumn is literally around the corner for us and everything is going to really cool down. I'm hoping this little gal will be able to grow until at least October. We'll see. And if not I'll just be happy with what I get. And next year I'll have two years of pumpkin growing & pumpkin mistakes under my belt which I'm sure will make next year better. I'm afraid I might be hooked.

So Sweet...

2009-08-27T14:40:00.002-06:00

I haven't really talked about this yet but school is going fabulously for Chloe this year. I had an endless list of frustrations with last year and one of the big ones was the amount of homework she had. And hour to an hour and a half per night- really. It was especially frustrating because her teacher said it would be 15-20 minutes a night. This year, however, she's gotten a teacher that seems to be anti-homework! Really. When the year started she had a substitute- for the first 5 weeks. I was very disappointed and thought it would be awful, how would Chloe cope with the change, would she cry for 6 months again? But it's actually been good. She didn't like the substitute teacher (who made her cry more than once in class) but loves her permanent teacher. She hasn't cried about going to school at all and I'm so thankful.

And we'll be leaving in just a bit for dance class at church. Chloe didn't do dance last semester because the first semester we just had too much going on. I was in choir and so was she and when we added that plus dance it was just too hectic. So she's in dance and I'm not doing anything- and I'm happy about that. I am doing the second semester in Freedom in Christ so I'm anticipating personal and spiritual changes in me. That's a good thing.

And I finally have a wee baby pumpkin blossom. Or female bloom. It hasn't actually bloomed yet although I look for it every morning. I counted 5 others on the plants so I'm crossing my fingers for more than one pumpkin.

Most of them look like this or smaller, if you can believe it. I was a bit neglectful of the plants thinking that they would get the nutrients that they needed from the ground. But they were a very pale green color and looked pitiful. Until I added some organic choice fertilizer and bone meal. They really like bone meal.. (sorry for the blurry picture)

but so do cats. I didn't really know that until a couple of weeks ago. Last week I saw a cat (that looked just like Phoenix) on the patio around my garden cart. He ran off and later in the day I was going to do some gardening and I saw the bone meal like this. I've since put it in the grill to keep the cats away. I feel bad and wouldn't mind feeding them but it makes them dependant on people and they would likely die if we weren't here any more to take care of them. I've got all sorts of things running around in my head for our cookout this weekend and I'm going to finalize the menu tonight. Mary offered to bring the burgers so that frees me up to make a nice appetizer (bruschetta maybe?) and a dessert or two to go with the one Mary is also bringing. There will be 15 people here so I don't think we could have too many desserts, right? Plus it gives me a chance to make some without having them sitting around here just waiting for me to eat them. I'm looking forward to a good weekend.

Good Things

2009-08-25T18:39:00.002-06:00

I'm feeling quite a bit better today. Not 100% but better. And so I asked Travis if we could meet downtown to walk for a bit. There were things I could do here. Plenty of things. But I stay inside these walls so much when I'm not feeling well that I want to take advantage of every opportunity to get out and walk and explore and just enjoy things. So we did. We all ate PB&J for dinner, it wasn't gourmet but it fit the bill for a really quick bite to eat. And we walked. One day I'm going to take a picture of the 4 churches we have in dtf within a couple of blocks. They're all pretty- beautiful really- I just think it's funny that there are 4 so close together.

This one is a Methodist church. When we got downtown it was 6 o'clock on the dot and the church bells were ringing. I thought "I live in a postcard". I had the biggest, silliest smile on my face.

And this is the church office. It's across the street and is right next door to the Presbyterian church. And this beautiful Victorian style house used to be Lillie Belle's tea room. But now it's Monell's restaurant. They serve country food family style. As in, you get large portions of food and pass it around. I really wanted to go there when it was a tea room. I guess the upside is that I won't know if anything changed if I'm able to go and won't be disappointed. I was feeling pretty tired at this point (I love Tennessee, I just wish my body did) so we decided to head back, but on our way we saw a street performer. Well, it was a guy with a guitar singing next to Mellow Mushroom. We weren't really in a hurry and Chloe wanted to give him some money. So she did and we decided to sit for a bit and listen to him. And I really liked his sound. I mean, guy+guitar, what's not to like? I can't vouch for his lyrics or anything because I only heard him for a bit but you can find him here. And while we were sitting and listening, Halle- sweet, shy Halle- started dancing. She was dancing kind of spazzy with her eyes closed as if she was thinking 'nobody can see me if my eyes are closed' but it was adorable. Then Travis and Chloe joined in. It was sweet and perfect and I thought "I'm just going to enjoy the moments". I don't have lots of times that I feel well. But today I had these moments and they were beautiful. I found myself thanking God for that moment because He gave it to me. Then we had to rush off because Travis is on call and got a page. But I got to drive and I went through two beautiful, historic streets that are off the main street that I love. I enjoyed looking at the homes and the sun started to set. I think that it was just about a perfect evening.

It's Going to be OK

2009-08-24T19:58:00.002-06:00

We're at the end of family night tonight. I took some Claritin and amazingly my shortness of breath and general crummy feeling subsided. It would really help if I could distinguish between allergies and real sickness. I mean, I'm pretty sure I had both but it's confusing because a different allergy pill didn't help but....OK, it's just confusing. I'm still really tired but overall I'm feeling better. Which means that I can get ready for a get-together I'm having this weekend. I haven't had one of those since Amanda's graduation. And I really like having people over.

I was able to do some experimenting in the kitchen tonight. And that's always a fun thing for me and a big irritation for Amanda since she does the dishes. I made a gravy that was really yummy and I think it's going to work for chicken pot pie too. Fantastic. I've always used soup because well, it's easier, but the last time I did it tasted gross to me. I also made that parsley paste I was talking about a few days ago. Parsley, olive oil and salt blended up together makes a nice paste that absolutely takes the garlic smell off my hands- yippee! And it gives me a use for parsley besides feeding caterpillars.

Backtracking a bit to yesterday...we took a trip to the park. The weather was just gorgeous- low 70's with little to no humidity and made it a necessity to be outside. And on the way there we noticed a house for sale in our neighborhood. It's bigger than ours by about 500 square feet and it was completely remodeled last year. They rented it out but I was hoping they'd sell and bring up the values in our neighborhood. So I checked it out today and it's nice inside- new kitchen, hardwood floors, etc. And the asking price is only 2K more than we paid for ours 3 years ago. *Before* we refinanced. Before the new roof. Before the floors. Before the windows. Before the new a/c. And I was bummed. Not freaking out mind you, but a little bummed. I guess it was also before the real estate market crashed. If we stayed here for 5 more years it would probably work itself out.

I had to tell Travis, of course, and we talked about maybe having to rent it out if we move before market values catch up to our house. I can't imagine renting because well, renters sometimes destroy houses- call me little miss sunshine. We ran an errand at Publix and I thought to myself "I'm going to trust God in this but I think I'm going to really have to work at it". Have you been there? Sometimes trusting God comes so incredibly easy and then sometimes it doesn't. So the girls and I went outside and waited in the car for Travis and I looked over and saw a bumper sticker. It said IGBOK. I've seen those before but I don't usually pay a lot of attention to bumper stickers. Under the big bold letters it said "It's going to be OK". Hmmm. It's not that the bumper sticker was telling me something I didn't already know but it's nice to see it in print. Yes, "all things work together for good" and lots of other scriptures say it's going to be OK, without actually saying "hey, Amy, it's going to be OK". But it is. I have to trust that this is God's plan and we just have to walk it out.

This Has Nothing to Do With Sunflowers...

2009-08-20T12:02:00.004-06:00

I mean, they might be making an appearance but this really has more to do with parsley. Yes, that's right parsley. Or to be more precise parsley flowers. That's what the little green flowery things are in the vases with the flowers. I'm slightly ashamed to admit that I didn't know that parsley flowered. But it does and they're so pretty I just had to use them. That and they were just out of control next to the lemon tree. I've never actually used the parsley for cooking although I have thought of trying to make a paste out of it to use on my hands after I mince garlic. I don't know about you but my fingers smell like garlic for three or four days after I chop the stuff. Which is why I don't make alfredo sauce that often. Pity. I have seen recipes that call for it in pesto but I'm certain that there are caterpillar eggs on it since I saw them around and well, that just kind of creeps me out.

I do think it's kind of funny that I've followed up a week of blogging by not blogging at all. It's been an interesting week though. A friend of mine from college called me and I hadn't talked to him in nearly a year. His life is in a much better spot than when I talked to him last. God's faithfulness never ceases to amaze me.
That same night Travis worked late and so I had a girls night with the kids- minus Amanda. We ate girly food- bagels with pink cream cheese, raspberries, blueberries and figs. And had pink soda. And we polished our finger and toe nails. It was really fun. I don't look forward to Travis working late but spending time with the girls made it much more enjoyable.

Saturday

2009-08-15T15:22:00.003-06:00

Guess who came to see me today. Allright, he didn't come to see me but I'm thankful that Travis had the camera handy. Yes, my sweet hubbie took this picture. Isn't he gorgeous? I never thought I'd get one this close up.

I had such big plans for this Saturday. Really. And I still feel not so fantastic. Even so I was determined to work through it and do my big project anyway. But my body won and I'll be watching a movie with the girls instead. Bummer. I *really* wanted to get this thing done. On the upside though Travis is doing the floors inside the hall closet and I really hope that he'll have the other finish work done on the floors by the end of the weekend. Oh and there's my birdie friend again.... And again. He's hard to see in this one but look towards the top. You get "Where's Waldo" points if you find him. Travis was very determined to sneak up on him and get some good pictures for me. He loves me. And thus concludes my blogging week. I'm a bit bummed that I didn't blog on Tuesday but I'll just have to be OK with it. Now I'm going to grab a blanket and lay on the couch and watch something ridiculous with my kids. It never ceases to amaze me that they can watch the same thing over and over and over. I'm still hoping I can summon the strength to do my project. I'm determined to get it done this week. I'll let you know what it is once we're done.

A Moment...

2009-08-14T19:35:00.004-06:00

As parents we make a million little decisions for our kids every single day. And sometimes it's tiring trying to do the right thing or figure out what the right thing is. Sometimes it's easier to go with the flow and give in to their relentless pull on the reigns that we hold. Other times something rises up inside us to say "no, that is absolutely not going to happen" or "yes, you are doing that and that's the end of it". But you never really know how it's working out, do you? Even good kids have attitudes that are less than stellar at times and it's frustrating to figure out how much space to give them and how much freedom and which decisions are going to be left up to them. Because there are decisions that we have to let them make.

Until your grown kid thanks you wholeheartedly for the way you raised them. When they express gratitude that you made them open a savings account and that you trust them to drive and that you encourage them to prayerfully take risks and you taught them to be an adult. Then you know that you did ok and that all those hours of prayers and tears and tough love and well, just regular love too, brought about the result you were working for all along. Not that it's over. I'll never stop being her mom but in time I'll step into more of an advisor and friend role rather than the raising her role. In some ways I wish we could go back. There are things I wish I did better but I'm also very thankful for the husband God gave me. And the dad he gave Amanda. He's raised her for more than half her life now. And I know she wouldn't be who she is without the father role he filled in her life. And I'm just very thankful and very, very blessed.

My Birdie Friends Are Back!

2009-08-13T19:02:00.003-06:00

I love sunflowers. Have I mentioned that before? I don't think I'll ever not grow them. I mean, they grow anywhere. I see random ones all over the place here. You know a bird had to have dropped a seed if it's in the middle of chest-high weeds. Bumble bees love them. Their fat little hind legs get completely covered in bright yellow pollen and it's the cutest thing ever. I'd take a picture but my camera just isn't equipped for that. I love my point and shoot but one day...I'll have a "real" camera. Back to the flowers. Hummingbirds love them too. It's so sweet to watch them and little finches that eat the seeds. The one pictured is a girl so she's not as pretty but she ate seeds for a really long time. I'm a dork but I love watching them. And they don't bother my tomatoes. Speaking of tomatoes, again, I thought that this little guy might be responsible for my messed up tomatoes. I've known that they were there eating my parsley which didn't bother me because they turn into really pretty butterflies and I don't really use the parsley for anything. But I did see one of them on my tomato plant which intermingles with the parsley plant. The info I read didn't say they would eat tomatoes though so I'm not sure. It's just that the info I've found on tomato plant diseases looks particularly vile in the pictures and my plants don't look like that. But I don't want to bore you with any more plant stuff. I'm not starting a gardening blog or anything. It is one of the big bright spots in my summer though. Seeing as how we have 5 months of brown grass and trees with no leaves to look forward to in the next few months. Autumn I'm totally looking forward to, winter not so much.

I'm also looking forward to making some house progress this weekend. Travis and I were both sick with some not-so-fun virus but we're both feeling a lot better today. That should get us through the weekend. I have some projects in mind but I'm really not sure what I'm going to tackle. Our project(s) will be mostly limited to the supplies we have on hand since our remodeling budget is really slim. Which brings out the creativity, right? Right. I'm sure it will be fun.

The Trouble With Tomatoes

2009-08-12T18:51:00.002-06:00

I had a thought early this week and it was that I should blog every single day- this week, not in general. I didn't blog yesterday but I did do two posts on Monday and that should count, right? At least it's possible that I could have the right number of posts by the end of the week. It's just for fun and to stretch me a bit creatively. And to make me actually write out the little posts I think of during the week and never get around to.

Anyway, tomatoes. I tried the fruit of my labor again with salt and pepper and I actually liked it. It tasted faintly of tomato but in a nice way. Travis loves eating them fresh but would prefer a more tomato-ey tomato. He's asked if I will grow big beef steak (or whatever they're called) next year. He wants them on burgers and sandwiches and as a snack and...funny he never mentioned that he loves tomatoes that much. That's the thing about my hubby. I love him so much but after being married for nearly 10 years there are still things I couldn't tell you about him. He is very low key and he rarely asks for anything-which is somewhat maddening. Why? Because I like to buy him things that he likes. It's a thing for me. But I digress.

The trouble with those lovely tomatoes though and growing things in general is that they can be temperamental. For instance- see the cracks in my otherwise lovely tomatoes? It's because it rained last night. Since I'm growing them in pots I water them but the soil doesn't stay too moist because of the drainage holes. But if it rains for hours the tomatoes suck up a bunch of water and crack. I had to do a bit of digging to find out what it was. I harvested some just a couple of days ago and they had no cracks and these were fine yesterday- until I checked them this morning after the rain. Very frustrating I tell 'ya. Travis will still eat them but I hate feeding him inferior tomatoes.

I apologize for the fuzzy picture on this one. It was nearly dark outside and I didn't realize that my camera was focusing on the dowel. Do you see the spot on this tomato though? That one I'm worried about. This tomato plant in general seems to be healthy but this spot looks like something either munched on it or it's some kind of disease. Gaaa. I'm glad I've been doing this for a while because stuff like this used to drive me mad. Again, the plant itself looks fine so maybe it's a fluke. And so ends my discourse on tomatoes. It might have been longer but Travis and the girls are watching Wipeout. Have you watched that show? It's ridiculously funny- for grown ups and little people. I hear a bunch of laughing and feel like I'm missing out. So I'm going to go watch people get knocked around a bit.

Photos...

2009-08-10T20:01:00.002-06:00

I don't claim to be a photographer- at all. I do really like taking pictures though. For the last few days I've been burning this candle. It's no less than 6 years old. I got it for free for hosting a Party Light party, I think that's the name of the company. And I didn't want to burn it all at once- it being an expensive candle and all. Eventually I forgot about it and remembered it and forgot about it again...until a few days ago. I pressed the sides down like you're supposed to for maximum burning potential until it breeched the wax dam holding it back and spilled out all over the candle plate. And the flame got pretty high...cool. So I took pictures. Unfortunately I couldn't control where it was or what was in the background since I was cooking sausage for Trav's breakfast tomorrow. But I couldn't pass up taking pictures of the flames. And well, that's all.

Grandma's Mug

2009-08-10T15:23:00.003-06:00

I grew up in Florida. You all know that. What you may not know is where all my other family was. My dad was from Pittsburg, Kansas and my mom was from Arkansas- all over Arkansas. My mom's dad was in the civil service although I have no idea what that is and he was also a Pentecostal preacher. Assemblies of God to be exact. We visited them every summer in Louisiana when I was a kid. And then in Arkansas when they moved back. My grandparents lived in an old house that probably used to be considered one of the well-to-do homes. It was on Main Street and it was big. At least I thought so. It had ceilings that were at least 12 feet high, maybe 15. And all of the doors had glass door knobs. The kitchen had cabinets built all the way to the top of the incredibly high ceiling and there was an ironing board built into the wall, hidden in a cabinet. In the back of the house there was a room, maybe it was a solarium, I'm not sure. The only time I saw it was when I was about 10. I just remember thinking that it was the most romantic, beautiful room in the whole world- completely surrounded by windows. My grandma used it as her sewing room so there were piles and piles of fabric everywhere. My grandma tended to be a bit of a pack rat. The next time we visited, that beautiful room had been torn down and two bedrooms and a bathroom were in it's place. It's understandable considering they had five kids and four of them were married with kids and well, there just wasn't enough room. So the beautiful room had to go. But I was so very disappointed.

It was in this house that my grandma's health began to deteriorate. She had a stroke and then another one that left her completely paralyzed on one side. And she had heart trouble. She took nitroglycerin tablets often. I didn't really understand what they were for. I was about 14 one summer when we were visiting and grandma had an episode with her heart. She was visibly in a great amount of pain and my grandpa was kneeling next to her praying. My mom and dad looked very concerned and my cousins were playing in the back. They had come into the room with me but I don't think they knew what to do. I couldn't leave. It's like I was paralyzed there and my heart felt like it was going to break. We lived so far away that we didn't have a relationship but she was my grandma. She was a person that was suffering and I couldn't do anything so I stood there and cried. And she saw me. I'm not sure if she appreciated the gesture or if she felt bad for me or what but after the episode was over she started gesturing to my grandpa. It was nearly impossible to understand her at this point. And I'm not sure what the reasoning was behind it but she wanted to give me a mug. And it said "I Love Mom". I thought it was strange then and, well, I still do. Maybe she was trying to tell me that she loved me. And so I kept it. All these years.

As a teenager, I kept it on my makeup table and it held brushes and pencils and such. And it's moved with me to every single place we've lived in. Fast forward to yesterday. It was one of the only clean cups in the kid cupboard. We have a kid cupboard for kids cups. I'm not sure why it was there but I decided to let Chloe use it and told her the story. A shortened version for Chloe's short attention span. I told her to be very careful but I just had a feeling that it was going to get broken. But it didn't. Not yesterday anyway. It got broken today. Amanda was doing the dishes and I think she dropped it. She called me to let me know that "you know that I Love Mom mug? Well, it broke and sliced my wrist". Sigh*. Thankfully it was just the handle. I don't know if all the pieces are there or if I can fix it. I will keep it in the cupboard though. It's the one thing that my grandma personally gave to me. I have an unfinished quilt and an old doll but those were given to me by my mom. I think if I learned anything from all of it, it's that sometimes you make a difference in someones life simply because of your position. I wish I'd known her better. I wish I'd been closer. But I know I'll see her again someday.

Edited to add that I was much more concerned about Amanda's wrist than I was with the mug at that moment. Her wrist is fine.

A Walk...

2009-08-09T19:39:00.003-06:00

I went for a walk with Chloe and Halle on Wednesday, I think. I'm not sure because my days sort of run together especially when there are more than one memory in the same place in the same week. Nope, I'm sure it was Wednesday because it was Thursday night that Trav, Chloe, Halle and I walked around downtown waiting for Amanda to get off work. And it was Wednesday that we walked around and looked at antique/junk shops. Whew, glad I straightened that out.

I love this house. I'm not a super big fan of columns (at least not this style) but they work here, I think. I did think it was kind of funny that they had bamboo roll up shades on the 2nd story window. It just makes me really wonder what that room looks like. Does it have a classic exterior and a modern interior? I'll probably never know.

And this sweet stone cottage-sigh. I don't usually like stone cottages. But this one is fabulous with paint peeling on the shutters and a side porch with breezy white curtains and window boxes that *always* have flowers in them. You all know that I (along with most everybody else in middle TN) loves downtown Franklin. And as with all downtown areas, there's the main street (coincidentally called Main Street) and then lots of other streets with homes and shops mixed in. We'd lived here for about two years before I even knew these businesses existed.

This one was pretty cool and was very much an antique shop. It had magazine type things from 1865 and antique ink bottles and things like that. And I realized that I probably am not going to go crazy for antiques. I love the desk on the front porch and they had antique ceiling tiles and lots of stuff with peeling paint and it was lovely. Cramped but lovely. Oh, and the owner had a beautiful long haired chihuahua named Diva. She was shaking like chihuahuas do *but* she loved my kids. She licked their faces and didn't want them to leave. And they asked if we could buy a dog like that one. Actually they asked if Chutney could be a dog like that. Because we picked out our dogs name about two years ago...and we don't have a dog yet. I *really, really* want one though. The shop next to it was just junk as far as I could tell but I'm obviously not an expert. My perception of the place could have been tainted though by the attitude of the sales lady. And I decided that just because it was in DTF didn't mean that it was a desireable place to shop. The antique "malls" were particularly hit or miss and I'm pretty sure that the Elvis Presley cookie jar was not an antique. But Chloe saw it and went on and on about "how he died on the toilet because he had drugs". And Halle said "he got fwushed down de potty"?!? It was a much longer and much louder discussion about the subject than I wanted to have. She learned about the incident from a friend from school.

I did however find an armoire, um thingy, that I love and have dreamt about owning since I saw it. It's made for a corner and I really could use that. And, well, I just think it's super cute.
I also fell for some of the stained glass windows. I've always been a sucker for those. They had some that were pulled out of a Nashville church. Not these, other ones, but I liked these too.

We visited other stores and some I liked; some I didn't. But the important thing is that the girls and I were able to walk outside on an August day that was really quite nice. It was warm but pleasant and there was a nice breeze. And we had cherry limeades waiting for us in the car. I'm looking forward to doing it again very soon.

Monday Monday

2009-08-03T19:22:00.002-06:00

It's Monday night and I've been a bit sore all day. Travis and I have begun our get-the-house-in-tip-top-shape campaign and we started in the yard. Wowza! Saturday was actually, really fun. I've been dying to get out there with the hedge trimmers and tame the bushes that made our house look desserted. I hacked away at the holly bush and made it look like a holly tree- except that I can only reach to a certain point and we don't have a ladder. So it's nicely manicured until it reaches the roofline and then it's just crazy. Travis was going to try to do it but there just wasn't a steady enough thing to stand on that made it wise to take a chain saw to it. I was really bummed because out of all the work I wanted to get done, I wanted that tree finished the most. Oh, and I cut through two extension cords. The second one actually briefly burst into a flame. That was a little scary. But I hacked away at every bush in the front and cut them all so that you could walk behind them without feeling like something could hide in there and grab you. We ended up with 5 bags full of clippings plus a large pile of branches on the curb. Thankfully our city waste department will come pick them up.

Travis, Amanda and Chloe worked on the parts of the driveway that have washed away. It had gotten so bad that driving up and down was really, really bouncy. The girls liked it but I didn't. So they were outside with shovels and a, um, wheeled cooler (ghetto, I know) taking gravel and dirt from the end of the driveway to fill in the missing parts. I'm sure that we'll look back on this someday when we live in a house with an intact driveway and say 'you remember when we used to have to put our driveway back together'? And we'll laugh and laugh. Overall, we spent about 8 hours over Saturday and Sunday working on it all. Saturday was a lot easier than Sunday was.

Saturday evening Travis took me out and we went to Pancho's Place. It's in the same plaza as Target, about 5 minutes from our house. I've wanted to go there since we moved (nearly *3* years ago. I can hardly believe it.) and it was really good. Of course, anything tastes good when you've worked that hard. After that we ran errands. It was supposed to be a date but we have so much to do and it's just easier to run errands when the little kids aren't with us. Besides it was raining and apparently Travis had a big master plan that was ruined by it. Bummer. It was just nice being out with him. I don't care so much what we were doing. Well, I wouldn't have liked a monster truck rally, but you get the idea.

And lastly, the other day we got a Costco magazine in the mail. Yes, I think it's kind of weird that Costco puts out a magazine. I usually throw them away without actually reading them but Travis got to this particular one first. Inside there was a story about a family that supplies apples and cherries to Costco. It's called First Fruits Orchard and is run by a family that are Christians. This family started out small and then ended up losing everything and then rebuilding again. They are unashamedly Christian and also very socially conscious. When the husband was a child he wanted to have his own orchard and to help starving orphans in India. And as an adult he's done both- and has adopted 9 orphans from India. They have an entire cherry orchard that's devoted to ministry with 100% of their profits donated. And they take incredibly good care of their workers. At one point they realized that their workers were keeping their children inside all day because they couldn't afford childcare. So they built a daycare for them. Then they realized that their workers were unable to afford decent housing for their families. So they built a neighborhood of 3 and 4 bedroom homes and rented them to their workers. The rent on a 4 bedroom house? About $485. And they help them buy houses and they built an elementary school and they give scholarships. You can read the whole article here. I really encourage you to read it.

I came away from reading it thinking "God can use anybody to do anything". I think it's more than a thought right now though, it's a passion. According to Ralph Broetje, the farmer, he's good at planting trees. He shouldn't be running the business he's running. But he is. And he's impacting people in this huge amazing way. I'm not saying that I'm going to run out and plant some fruit trees and become a farmer. That's not my gifting. I do want fruit trees but that's something else- I just like fruit. I used to think that the only way to positively impact the world for Christ was to be in full-time ministry. But how can you be Jesus to people more than this family is? I'm sensing a paradigm shift in me. A very real big shift. And maybe this whole journey has been a shift and I'm just now realizing it. I've always known that I could do anything and minister to people. But now I *know* that I can do anything and minister to people. God can do anything through anyone that is willing to follow Him. It's is sometimes a very long, arduous, winding road. But it's His road and we're walking it out with Him. What's it going to look like? I don't know. But I'm very excited to find out.

Ooh, Pretty!

2009-07-29T17:19:00.004-06:00

I was at Target today. I haven't been there since I bought Chloe's school supplies a couple of weeks ago. And so I decided I'd take the grand tour and scope out some clearance stuff. And oh, the things I found. They have some summer things like flip flops and table cloths and summery wheel spinny things for 90% off. But I didn't need any of those things. Not even though it was 49 cents. But I made a mental note before vacation to look through the picture section because they have one seasonal isle that was on clearance. So I passed through and found two matted and framed sailboat pictures- for $4.98 each- mwahahaha. I didn't even think much about the boats because you can remove the back and put your own thing in there if you want to. I thought about doing another couple of pear things. But I needed something in the living room. I've been thinking of buying a huge canvas and doing some sort of painting. I even thought about a sailboat. But then I saw a fantastic- huge mirror- for $14.98 and I was sold. So for $25 dollars I revamped one wall in the living room.

Here's the yawn-inducing before. I knew that the mirror was too high but I never got around to fixing it. But I never really realized that it was *way* too small for the space.

And here's the much better after. Except that they still look small in the photograph...not sure about that.

Boat #1...

Boat #2....

And here's a better photo of them together. I'm mixing styles a bit but I like it and well, I guess that's all that really matters. I think that I have to change the color of the walls though. The furniture just blends right into the wall. Throw pillows would probably help but they're kind of a pain to live with. So my thought is to go with a lighter shade of beige (not sure if that will help with the couch) and to paint every bit of trim and furniture (side table, armoire) in a crisp white. And do white curtains instead of the gray-blue that we've got going on in there now. It makes things kind of dark. I'd be copying these bloggers- they've posted what colors they used- because I think it really works. And it's light and bright and is really what you want in a 10x15 foot space. Then I could do brighter pillows and possibly even an area rug if it didn't cramp things too much. I like their bedroom idea too. It's a bit fancy for my taste but it could fix the problem that we have with the breaker box being in our master bedroom. I've got lots of thoughts and I can't wait to get started.

Stuff...

2009-07-27T11:32:00.004-06:00

Apparently painting for fun agrees with me. I've felt so inspired lately and I even finished a painting. And I am completely happy with how it turned out. I might do some minor tweaking but other than that I'm signing it varnishing it and I'm done. I might even do a pear series or something. They're fun to paint, it hardly takes any time at all, and they're *green* so it's a win-win-win. Except I did buy a red pear once that I intended to paint so maybe I'll do a red one too. And in other things artsy related- drumroll please....Amanda has been invited to attend The New York Conservatory of the Dramatic Arts. Um, yeah, wow! IN NYC!!! The thought right now is for her to attend their summer session next summer. So my kid could be spending a month next summer in NYC! I'm so excited for her. She'll be spending about the same amount of money as she did for AMTC but it covers her room and it's in a fabulous city. So, nothing is set in stone right now but she is applying.

And I wanted to add this just because it's funny. Apparently the antibiotics I'm taking are causing me to have very vivid and extremely weird dreams. Let's see- one night I dreamed I had a moustache. The next night I dreamed about talking, biting trout and whitewater rapids. The next night the dream was so bizarre that I won't even type it out- but it concerned people that I went to high school with. And the next night I dreamed that all of the Buttons were in a communist country and were trying to run away. But it was comical, like a musical, and there were car chases and we eventually got out of the country by stowing away on a cruise ship. Because cruise ships often depart from communist countries. But it's keeping me from sleeping well. There's lots of running in all my dreams...so I'm hoping that everything will be back to normal soon.

First Harvest

2009-07-25T12:12:00.003-06:00

Back to happy thoughts. We've been sick since we got back from vacation and two full weeks inside the house gives me *way* too much time to think and get frustrated. Chloe missed the entire week of school last week. Sigh. But I think we've nearly conquered this thing and that will be nice. And maybe I'll get out of the house next week.

Here are my first two wee tomatoes. They're pretty and pear shaped...and they still taste like tomatoes. And I hate tomatoes. I tried one. I even chewed it up and swallowed it. And besides the tomato flavor it was, well, OK it was gross. And the slimy inside stuff...blech. But they're pretty and pretty counts. Thankfully Travis loves tomatoes and he said they were good. And I like cooked tomatoes and salsa so I still have hope.

And my mini cor carrots. One of them had actually gone to seed by the time we got back. I thought that the seeds would develop on the green stuff but nope. The carrots themselves get hollow inside and develop seeds. Overall the carrot thing was a bust but maybe I'll try again next year. And there's still basil growing and a pumpkin. Although I have yet to see any female blooms on the things. So we'll see. I'm sort of kicking myself for not growing cilantro. I picked up the package in the spring and really considered it but didn't get it. You have to have cilantro for salsa. So now I'll have to overpay for it at the store. Ah, but no worries. I'm resolved to not freak out about anything. And to get some fresh air. I think I need it.

More Thoughts...

2009-07-24T14:24:00.003-06:00

I was thinking today about what I'm going to do next year when Halle goes to school. I have had this thought several times and the thoughts just sort of swirl around landing wherever. I think about what I'm interested in and if I'd want to do that all day, every day. I picked up my paint brushes for the first time in I don't even know how long. And I thought that maybe I should take a drawing class and practice really hard so that I don't have to go sit in a boring office making somebody's copies for them and answer their phone. And decided that I don't have to be the best painter in the world or be in a gallery or sell anything because, well, I just like painting sometimes. I like it when I have paint on my hands. And why does it have to be anything bigger than that? Yes, eventually I will run out of walls to put things on but that day is not today. And I realized that I don't want to do that. I don't want to be a chef and cook for people all day, every day. And I don't want to be a designer either. I don't really want to go to graduate school. And I thought that maybe there is nothing in this whole wide world that I can imagine doing for my whole life. And then I thought 'I want to be a minister of music'.

I should probably have my head examined. But I like leading worship and I like conducting choir rehearsal. But honestly, for the most part I don't really like church. What? I guess I should say that I don't like the church machine. The machine that makes you fit into the mold where you say the right thing (whether or not it's actually the truth) and you wear the right thing and God forbid, you say something that's truthful and challenging because if you do you're going to hear about it on Monday morning in the form of your pastor chewing you out. Because they don't like your hair or your clothes or your face and type A women freak people out. You couldn't possibly be intelligent or have anything meaningful to say so you get relegated to office duties and don't get to visit people in the hospital and pray for them or do anything to help anyone because the fact that you exist just really pisses people off. And instead of someone saying 'hey maybe we should drop our stones and give her a chance' they just keep throwing them. Because you couldn't possibly be human and they couldn't possibly be making your life a living hell. Because there are very few Christians mature enough to say 'You know what? It's not about me. I may not like her leadership style but God placed her here and I'm going to support that'. And the funny thing is that it always surprises me when it happens. And I'll just add that I made mistakes. Which I always say but I'll say it again- I didn't do everything right. But I really, really tried to.

Ministry to me has always been about helping people. Seeing God heal people emotionally, physically and spiritually. And leading worship is the way that God called me to do that. I can't imagine doing anything else and I can't imagine doing it either. My dad worked at the Post Office for his whole career. I don't think that was his calling. My husband works in the computer field but he's a teacher, really. And a song writer. Millions of people do what they have to do and never get the opportunity to fulfill what they're passionate about. I think that I just didn't know it was still there. And I never thought I'd have such disdain for the machine. I've been a follow the rules, that's just the way things are girl for such a long time that I don't even know what to make of it.

So there you have it. A rant whether you were ready for it or not. I guess I have more to sort out. I usually just stuff it down and don't think about it because I'm kind of tired of all that. But for today I will take care of my kids and maybe finish a painting and move on. Except it doesn't feel like I'm moving on, it feels like I'm sitting completely still. Stuck in some prison and for what? I have no idea. I'll get back to that painting though.

Really

2009-07-22T11:12:00.005-06:00

I really, really want to post about something interesting. Unfortunately there is nothing going on right now that is interesting. Dr.'s appointments and antibiotics are beyond boring and I'm just over the whole thing. I came back from vacation inspired and hopeful and ready to tackle everything on the home front- even painting the cabinets. But I've been sidelined since then. Now the only thing I've accomplished is watching way too many Gilmore Girls episodes. You know you've watched too much when you start thinking and you hear Lorelai's voice in your head. Sheesh. But I'm on antibiotics and so I'm hopeful that I'll be able to start some things soon. Actually today I will tackle the house and clean until I'm ready to pass out. It's amazing the mess that happens when the big people are incapacitated. And now the little people that made the mess are incapacitated which means I get to clean up. Coffee definitely helped on the energy front.

So I had to go looking for inspiration. And Coastal Living is a good source of that. I really love that magazine since, well, it's coastal *and* there are lots of cottages. Because beach people like the relaxed feel of a cottage. Can you imagine kicking off your flip flops in a big modern space?

This kitchen would be perfect for me if it didn't have the gingham inspired ceiling. I like painted ceilings but this is a bit too country- for me. You might love it. But I love the island and space and white-ness of it. Do you guys like open shelving? I think it looks nice but I can't imagine having it myself. It makes me think that I'd have to rinse whatever dish I was using before I used it- dust you know. I've also found that whatever is up high near the stove gets a greasy, dusty, sticky film on it. Maybe not with this really big vent hood thing. Overall I like the simple, laid-back style and the white makes it look very clean. But not as clean as this one. I love the retro appliances. And the glass fronts on the cabinets are fantastic. I'd have to at least add some brightly colored dishes and small appliances though. Got to have color. Actually this is about perfect. Of course, my favorite color is green so I would love it. But those windows on either side of the stove are fantastic. And I am sort of drooling over the stove. That's another thing I came home inspired to do- cook. Angie (my sister in law) subscribes to a weekly Publix e-mail that sends her recipes for the week along with a shopping list that centers around what's on sale. So she's always making something interesting and new...and I'm pretty much stuck in a 5 dish rut. So as soon as we're all better I'm going to make pesto. Yeah, I know, easy peasy- but I've never made it before and if we all like it then I have 6 dishes that I make. And I'm growing basil again and have to do something with it. But I always imagine that I'd be much more inspired with a stove like this. A girl can dream, can't she? And while my favorite color is green, this shade makes me kind of nauseous. Maybe it looks different when photographed (the sun hitting the island makes the color look less, um, vomitous) but it's really just overload to me. I like the layout though and the cabinets to the ceiling. I'm not sure what the letters are for and I'm not really into that but in a different color (white with bright accents) this one might be my favorite.

So there you have it. My borrowed inspiration. Actually I should have borrowed my inspiration from Mr. Clean because that's what I'll be doing for the next few hours.

First Day of Third Grade

2009-07-17T16:23:00.005-06:00

Today was Chloe's first day of third grade. And I forgot to get a picture this morning. Why? Because when I got her up this morning, I also checked on Halle who was very hot and when I checked her temp. it read 104.9. Yeah. The last three times she's gotten sick we've had temps like this, before then she was strictly a 102 girl. I didn't freak out like I've done the last couple of times, mostly because she wasn't throwing up this time. I gave her some ibuprofen and some cold water and she was in a really good mood. Which is why I didn't immediately call the doctor. Her temp came down to 104 very quickly and she was joking around and asked for pop tarts. So, yeah, she was OK. But in all the hullabaloo, I forgot to take Chloe's picture. So the pictures from last nights registration will have to do.

She was so excited that she primped all day long. "Mommy does my hair look good like this"? "I think my hair looks good over one eye". "Can I have some lipstick"? "I want to be like Amanda". And therein lies the source of it. She wants to be like Amanda- who didn't care about any of that until she was 11 or 12. I'm so not ready for that.

I did notice a huge difference between this classroom and her last. This one is much more sparse without the bright colorful, school type decorations. Even the rug they sit on is plain. So do kids just outgrow that between 2nd and 3rd grade? They have individual desks instead of the quad tables they've been sitting at and all around the room just says that they're in the big time now.

She did end up having her best friend in her class. I'm not sure how that worked out but I'm glad it did. I am really happy that she's happy and I know we did the right thing by sending her back. I was really unsure about it even as late as this past Monday but Travis and I just made a decision and stuck with it.

Thankfully she wants to go back on Monday. For the last two years she's cried for the first 6 months. If I can avoid that at all then I want to.

And completely off the subject but very yummy are the Ranier cherries,mmmmm. Very sweet and a nice back to school treat. And they're buy one get one free at Publix right now, nice.

Energy Efficient Stuff...

2009-07-15T10:57:00.009-06:00

So when you spend a gazillion dollars on something it seems like you should get more satisfaction from it than merely being comfortable. I mean, shouldn't you be able to drive it or something? I have realized in the last couple of days that we are willing to spend big bucks in order to not be miserable. And even more to be healthy. We're having the ducts cleaned on Thursday- I'm pretty sure that's *never* been done and we had this UV thing installed too. Travis has suspected for a while that the dirty air ducts were at least contributing to my feeling crummy, so we'll see what happens. Oh and I thought that being energy efficient and all that this unit would be smaller. Not so. This thing is *huge*. It's actually bigger than the behemoth it replaced. But it qualifies for the $1,500 tax credit. That made the price a bit easier to swallow. Couple that with the energy efficient windows and we will hopefully see a decrease in our electric bill.

And see the cool new thermostat-thingy? I don't know about you guys but there is always a fight at the Button house over this thing. I like it colder because I get hot, Amanda likes it warmer because she gets cold and Travis likes it warmer because he has to pay for it. I'm always accusing him of pushing it up to 78 and he's always accusing me of pulling it down to 70 because well, those things are hard to read. But no more! The a/c guy said that we should leave it within 3 degrees constantly and it will automatically switch to heat if the temp gets to be below 69- pretty cool. Or warm, as the case may be.

And here's a little thing I meant to show you guys months ago and then it just seemed lame after we installed it. I tried to find a picture on the internet since this one just looks kind of creepy (yes, we need a new tub). Anyway, we installed this one after our other shower head broke off- seriously. We were kind of panicked thinking we were going to have to hire a plumber. But after talking to my mom (who does *all* of the home repairs at their house) she said it was easy-peasy to replace. And she was right. The previous arm for the shower head was plastic. Not sure what brainiac thought that one up but it was. We replaced it with a metal one that was really inexpensive and this eco-flow shower head. Ours does not have 3 modes like the one in the link. But it was only $20 at Target and has paid for itself several times over since we purchased it. I really think we're saving that much per month. How? Well the kiddos like to take really long showers and Amanda takes really long showers and well, it just adds up. It also conserves hot water. It used to be that in the winter time we'd get through 1 1/2 showers on a Sunday morning before all the hot water ran out. So two people always ended up really unhappy. We had this thing for the whole winter and we never ran out of hot water. I also love that it's hand held so it's much easier to wash the kids hair. Eco friendly or not, I wished we'd purchased one years ago for that alone. And for those of you (Mary) that noticed how low the shower head was before it added a few inches so I no longer have to bend over backwards to wash my hair.

OK, so I'm done with that. But it wouldn't be summertime if I didn't incessantly show you things that I'm growing. I get frustrated sometimes because things don't turn out the way I want to and by the end of the summer I'm tired of watering stuff and I think that I'm just not growing anything next year. And then I see the seeds in the store and I'm like a junkie. I cannot pass them by. My carrots were pretty much a bust. I think there were just too many carrots in that pot and apparently they like elbow room. We did eat some and I have a picture but I think I'll try them again next year. The only thing is that you only get 1 carrot per plant. Which means if you want a lot of carrots then it takes a lot of space. I'm not really into the whole one and done thing. But they are fun.

This is an updated picture of my yellow pear tomatoes. See? They are really not a one and done sort of plant. And apparently they take a while to ripen. I thought we'd get back from vacation and the ones I was watching so carefully would be rotten- but not so. I have noticed that some blooms aren't fruiting and are falling off. Not sure what's causing that. And I am going to have to stake them. If I could only kick the flu and get to the store. There are some blooms at the top that will take the plant out once those tomatoes get bigger. And these guys are way bigger than I thought they would be. I was thinking grape tomato size but these are bigger. And I'm still hoping I'll like them.

Oh, and the grubby looking orange thing is the kids wading pool. Last year I paid Grant to water my flowers but that's a lot to ask of a friend- coming over every-single-day. I also thought of a water timer but it was nearly $30 so I filled the kids wading pool with water and stuck the plants in it. They all have drainage holes in the bottom or on the sides so my thought was that they would suck up the water as they needed it. And it worked because they were all alive when I got home. I do wonder if too much moisture was the tomato blossoms problem though. We'll see. And here's my sunflower patch this year courtesy of the neighborhood birds. Oh and my new roof- just noticed that. I only had 3 plants last year and this year I have no idea how many there are. It looks kind of pitiful right now but in a couple of weeks I'm going to have a lot more flowers. I really love them. I wouldn't say that they're my favorite flower- I don't think I have a favorite- but they're so easy to grow. And they're so low maintenance, I just really love growing them.

Just Really Happy

2009-07-14T12:53:00.002-06:00

I'm sitting here listening to Chloe talk to me- she's oblivious to the fact that her constant chatter is distracting. And she reads really well now so I think she's reading over my shoulder. And she thinks it's funny. I'm also waiting on the a/c company to come out and replace our a/c unit. If you've checked facebook you probably already know that the four Button girls haven't been feeling well- flu and other things- and that our a/c died yesterday. The compressor is out and we could have just replaced that but our unit is so old that we won't be able to get any coolant for it next year so we'd be spending a big chunk of cash only to turn around and do it again at some point. Plus since we're planning on selling at some point in the near future a 16 year old a/c unit isn't exactly a selling point. But the nice thing is that we're also getting the ducts cleaned- I don't think that's ever been done- and we're having some UV thing put in that zaps all manner of airborne virus, bacteria, etc. That should be fantastic for me health-wise. Of course, we've done so much to our little house now that I'm not going to want to sell it. I've become attached to the place. Sigh.

And I have to say that in the midst of having the flu and all the other sickness in the house and the a/c and being hot right now I have tremendous peace and joy. God is really so good. I was looking back today at different things that have happened over the years and how we'd stress and flip out and how much at peace we are now and I'm thankful.

I don't think I'm going to do a play by play of vacation this time. We had a fabulous time but it really revolved around spending time with family rather than going to fabulous destinations. It was a great time of bonding with our family- especially the nieces and nephews and I'm just really thankful.

So fantastic was the bonding time that the last night we were there Halle just climbed up on uncle Shane's shoulders. She didn't ask she just did it. You know you're ok with Halle if she does that.

And sweet little Kyleigh *loved* uncle Trav. He was super excited- if you can't tell by his big smile in the picture.

Chloe missed the trash can on our way down and I was really picture happy- so I took a picture of it.

This is what happens when you don't want your picture taken and your wife wants to take your picture. Bahahaha! I love my honey.

On the way down to AL my parents had taken Chloe and Halle with them so the bigger Button peeps had a *really* good time together. We also had a fantastic time with Chris and Christy. Yummy food and great conversation. As soon as we got there miss Emma showed me her fabric stash- she's 8! It was so sweet. And she'd made a purse for Chloe. Like mother like daughter. Those were actually the only non-related people we ended up seeing while we were there. You can find Christy's account here. It was less than two weeks ago but so much has happened it feels like a lifetime already.

We didn't do any of the other Lakeland stuff that we usually do. Probably because of the amount of driving that we'd done, we were just wiped out. Travis took Chloe to the bouncy house place the night before we left (I stayed at Shane and Angie's with Halle who was sick) and I found out that the bouncy thing that Mary sprained her ankle on is no longer there. So Mary actually shut down an attraction. It seems like there should be an award or something for that. Maybe an ice cream sundae?

OK, so I guess that's it. I'm trying to think of something fun to post about later...I think my thinker will work much better once we have the new a/c unit in.

Thoughts...

2009-07-12T17:19:00.002-06:00

We made it. Thankfully. I spent the last hour of the drive reading things from Laugh Break to Trav. We were laughing so hard- even Amanda, who was laying in the back seat with a fever. I think my favorite was this one. And I should have expected that the end of this trip would leave me very introspective. I think we have resolved some things though. The first thing is that McDonald's is never, ever an eating option again. I know, life changing, right? And the second thing is that Lakeland is the place we want to be. It's the only place we're looking right now. The job market in Lakeland isn't huge- but we only need 1 job. The location might not seem like much of a revelation but we've been very unsure of where we'd end up. But after spending so much time with my brother and his family and Trav's brother and his family we're certain that it's where we want to be. During the last 6 months I've expected God to just say 'this is where you're going to be' clearly but He hasn't. That's new territory for me. But when we were there I think we both just knew that's where we'd be. I suppose that could change but I'm not really expecting it to.

We drove a lot on this trip- 2,727 miles to be exact. It's less than 800 miles to Lakeland. But we drove to Kissimmee several times (that's actually where Disney and most attractions are, not Orlando) to be with Amanda plus over to the coast a couple of times and to visit grandparents...lotsa driving I tell you. But I had an opportunity to talk to my 16 year old nephew who is going through a lot right now. Things are happening there now that we need to be there for. And our kids had the opportunity to play with their cousins- all of them. It was heartwarming and beautiful and if God called us there for no other reason than for our family I think that's enough.

So where do we go from here? I'm not sure. Travis was able to meet some people that work with his brother and his resume is in there. I think it's always good to have a face with a resume. I ran into an old friend from college (he just moved back to Lakeland that week) and he suggested looking at our alma mater- d'oh, didn't think of that. And we'll just see what happens. There is the little matter of the house. I don't know what to do about that except fix the little things that we can for now. I think I'm going to paint everything very soon. I've tried stripping the varnish off of the kitchen cabinets and it really gunks up the sand paper- we'll see how that goes. And just see what God does. I do feel refreshed and re-energized on that front so maybe I can make some real progress. That would be nice.

I'm also struggling a bit with Chloe going back to school on Thursday. I really don't feel ready to let her go; it's gone by so quickly. But I guess if I have house stuff to work on, it's better for her to be in school than stuck inside the house watching TV while I work. Oh, and the car issue? Travis made a bunch of phone calls and found one place that could work on our car before we left. He and I drove there on Thursday and as we passed by I got a sick feeling in my stomach- and so did he. So we came home, prayed and felt like we should wait. We weren't sure what we were waiting for and we had to leave on Saturday. It didn't make any sense but we did it anyway. That afternoon I went to Target and the check engine light was still on (if you don't remember two different people told us it was a transmission issue) and when I came out it was off. I was a little nervous and expected it to come back on but it never did. We drove the aforementioned 2,727 miles and the car was completely fine. God knows so much more than we do and I'm thankful for that. I'm really looking forward to what He's going to do. And I promise that I'll share a synopsis at least and pictures from the trip soon. But they're all on Facebook if you *really* want to see them all ;-)

A Million O'Clock

2009-07-11T21:34:00.002-06:00

No there's no such thing as a million o'clock but it feels like it. We're on our way back and it's 11:36 pm ET. I think Georgia is the longest state ever- it's not but it feels like it. We've been stricken with sickness in the last couple of days. Halle apparently has a double ear infection. She was screaming last night "it hurts deep in my brain"!!! So very sad. It's only her second ear infection *ever*. We're keeping it at bay with an ibuprofen/tylenol every 3 hour switch plus homeopathic ear drops and numbing ear drops that Angie had. I'm hoping we'll be OK through tomorrow so I can take her to the Dr. on Monday- unless the homeopathic ear drops work their magic before then. It's worked for Chloe before but I'm not willing to give them any time past Monday- she's been pretty miserable. And Amanda feels like she has the flu. It's gotten progressively worse during the day.

But I sound like a negative nelly, right? We had a great trip, really. We just got a really late start today because Halle was up so late last night. I think we're close to Chattanooga so I'm expecting to get home around 2am. But at least we get to sleep in our own beds. Pictures and such later...

On Our Way...

2009-06-27T11:48:00.001-06:00

There's too much to tell right now. I'll just say that the car issue seems to have resolved itself and we're headed out this evening. I'm stressed beyond belief and can't believe that even though I started packing on Monday I still have a ridiculous amount of stuff to do. Deep breath. See you soon....

She Cracked the Rules!

2009-06-24T11:32:00.004-06:00

Last night Halle was wailing- loudly. I knew she wasn't hurt because it was her angry cry. Travis went to investigate and Halle wailed "she cracked the rules" at the top of her lungs. Travis said "what?" clearly confused and Chloe said nonchalantly "she means I broke the rules, that's how she says it". Very funny.

So we're 3 days out from our trip and we have transmission trouble. We know a guy that just put brakes on our other vehicle and he took a look at our main van and said there's absolutely no way we could drive to Florida with it as it is. He said it's a something or other but if we fix it now we won't have to have the transmission rebuilt- good to know. But we haven't been able to get it fixed because we can't get in touch with him- because he has to talk to somebody...and we're running out of time. He fixed the brakes on Trav's van but it took two days. And that was for brakes. I'm no mechanic but it seems like a transmission is harder to get to- being in the front of the car with the engine and all. Hmmm. I think it's going to be interesting to see how this plays out. Thankfully Travis handles the car stuff. And God has it all under control. I wouldn't say I'm nervous- just curious. Ok, and really excited because I know that God has some big things in store for us. So right now it looks like the bottom is falling out- two big car repairs in the last two weeks and we absolutely refuse to use credit cards for anything. We've drawn a line in the sand so to speak. But things aren't always as they appear. 2 Kings chapter 7. We're leaving Saturday. And everything that God has purposed for us for this trip will be accomplished.

Fun Stuff

2009-06-22T10:59:00.001-06:00

In the midst of getting ready for our trip I've had some plant life happiness too. Like these eraser size little green tomatoes. It's so cool! I haven't ever grown any kind of thing to eat- other than the pumpkin last year but Chloe planted that at school. I'm positively twitterpated! My mom says I get it from my her mother- although my grandpa (dad's side) always grew stuff too. Maybe it was just that generation with their victory gardens. Travis and I have dreams of making salsa with them. Yellow salsa? They're supposed to be sweeter so I thought about mixing them with mangoes or peaches for a salsa- with the handy dandy magic bullet my parents bought Travis for Christmas.

And how about this sweet little sunflower? You might not be able to tell but this guy is only about two feet tall. I've seen seeds for varieties like this but haven't ever actually planted them. So my guess is that one of my birdie friends dropped a seed from somewhere else into my yard. This one has grown behind where we keep the trash can. It doesn't have any other small blooms though so this might be a one and done type flower. If it is that would be disappointing- that's why I always grow varieties with lots of blooms. But if you planted hundreds of seeds that would be spectacular.

And here's a pathetic little carrot. I knew that we were close to harvest time and I couldn't resist pulling one to see how they were doing. Boy was I disappointed. I'm not sure if they're too crowded or not getting enough water or what but this little guy is way small to have all that foliage on top, don't you think? We ate it anyway. It was kind of bitter but very carrot-y tasting. And somehow it made me feel all happy inside. I'm wondering if I should delay harvesting until we get back from FL. I'll have to do some researching today. I probably should have done that a couple of months ago. And now there is much to do. I've already done some big things but I'm making a list of everything that needs to go into our bags. I always try to do it from memory and I *always* forget stuff. Then we end up having to go shopping as soon as we reach our destination. It's very frustrating. And I have to wash and clean out the car...you know the drill. So until later...

Because It Was Horrible to My Taste

2009-06-19T11:15:00.003-06:00

This past Monday was family night of course, and I made burrito fixings since everybody loves burritos. Mostly. Actually, Chloe and Halle like bean burritos- the Taco Bell variety. I forgot to buy a can of refried beans so they were out of luck. But I did grill some chicken breasts that were marinated in Mojo. I love that stuff (it comes in a big bottle at Publix- do not buy Publix brand, blech) actually I love Cuban food and am very glad that I married a Cuban. Anyway, if you marinate the chicken for about 30 minutes (there's citrus in the marinade and it can start to cook the meat if you do it for longer) and grill it and it's fabulous- and really simple. We made burritos for the girls and all of a sudden Halle spit out something and we asked her what she was doing. To which she replied- "I spit out da chicken 'cause it was horrible to my taste". I wanted to be upset but I couldn't help but laugh.

Something that Travis brought home last night was horrible to my taste too...this pretty little apricot. So sad...

I've never actually had an apricot before that wasn't dried so I was excited to try it. Unfortunately it was mealy and tasteless and dry. I didn't finish eating it. It had to be that particular fruit because Travis loves them but he didn't like this one either. We'll have to try it again sometime.

In other news I've figured out my remaining sickness issue. Yeah, really I have. I'm allergic to TN. That's kind of anti-climactic, right? But I've noticed that my fatigue, headaches, feeling like I have a cold or flu symptoms were the same as when we had the cats. It left when we got rid of them and came back when allergy season started. So now when there's no tree pollen I feel fine, when it's low I start getting sinus headaches and really tired- any more than that and I'm done for. But I'm not the only one. My dad said he used to feel like he had the flu a couple weeks out of every month when he lived in FL. So yeah, that's it. It's nice to know that I'm not really, actually sick. My immune system isn't wrecked like I thought it was and that's encouraging. The not encouraging part is staying in bed for two to three weeks at a time because I'm allergic to trees. I love trees. And I love TN. But it's making Florida look even better. I wonder if I'd be OK vacationing here? We used to vacation in NC and I was just fine. Very sad.

And on another note- I finally have Amanda's schedule! And I don't think I'm going to be all that busy with her stuff. I need to look at it again but she really wants me there for her competitions and for the award ceremony- for which I need at least a semi-formal dress. I don't really feel like buying one of those right now. And I'm having a bit of trouble not being critical about some aspects of this whole thing. I know that acting is my daughters passion and I appreciate that. I just hate the whole modeling, image aspect of it. I found myself being a bit sickened as I watched a little girl of about 5 posing for her dad when I was at Amanda's last practice. She was made up like a little model and clearly that's the aspiration. It's just not my thing. So I need to make it a goal to not judge and be loving and excited for these kids- and adults- that are trying to make a career in a field completely about image. And talent- a lot of these kids are really talented. And this is what Amanda is called to. I'm supporting her and praying for her. I just need to leave my condescending, self righteous attitude...well, I should just lose the attitude. Ooh, I think it worked...I feel much better now ;)

And I think that's all of my ramblings for the day.

By Request

2009-06-18T10:22:00.002-06:00

Christy requested a picture of my new hair and I'm glad to oblige since I don't really have anything else to blog about today. Now, I'm as vain as the next girl (more than some, less than others) and I hate taking my own pictures. The only thing I hate more than that is to post pictures that are less than flattering. These pics left me running for some powder since I'm sans makeup but I decided to not retake them because, well, whatevah. I'm hanging out with the kids today and no makeup takes 10 minutes off my routine so there you go.

From the front...

And from the side-ish...
It's really the easiest hairstyle ever and Rhonda is a magician, I think.

Summer time...

2009-06-17T15:43:00.004-06:00

Today I'm thankful. Thankful for a husband that can talk me down off a ledge, a new haircut and a new person to cut my hair. Not that the person that used to cut my hair left me desiring better hair, it's just that the price tag for said hair cut left me looking for ways to save money. Thankfully a woman in my life group is a hair stylist that stays home with her kids. She gives really good, really cheap haircuts. Nice. I miss the massage-y chair when I get my hair washed but the price more than makes up for it and I don't have to find a babysitter for the kiddos- it's a win-win.

I've made a partial list of things that I need to do before we leave (10 days!) and have crossed some things off already. Like having the tires rotated- blech. I usually pick the worst times to do it and end up wandering around Costco for a couple of hours but yesterday it was done in 35 minutes, yay! So before I run off to do laundry and make dinner (pancakes, eggs and sausage- yum) I'll give a brief overview of what's going on around here for summer. Oh and btw, I've been out in the sun quite a bit and am several shades darker than Trav- bahahaha!

Sweet little bathing suit clad girls... Roses are still blooming some...

Really, really weird looking bugs....

Carrots! The mini variety...
Basil...

Pumpkin blossoms...

And tomato blossoms!!! Already! I didn't expect to see blossoms for a few more weeks. According to the research I've done they produce lots of tomatoes and they have a milder flavor than grocery store tomatoes. I hope I like them. If I don't, I'm not sure what I'll do with them.

Dreaming...

2009-06-12T11:53:00.005-06:00

I thought I'd follow up my previously melancholy post with something a bit more fun. I've been feeling a bit melancholy recently (might have something to do with my being stuck in the house) and I find that beachy pictures cheer me up.

Like this beautiful beach cottage bedroom. I love blue and green together. all pictures are from Coastal Living

Could you imagine having breakfast with this view? Scones and coffee and fresh fruit...mmmm... Or this one? I'm not sure I'd want coffee in this setting. I think I'd have to have something more tropical.

An outdoor claw foot tub...divine.

A peaceful reading spot would be nice too. And to go with my beachy theme I'll give you a recipe for fruit salad that I made on Memorial Day. I stole the idea from a Publix magazine but modified it because there was way to much sugar in it. I used honey for this but you could use blue agave nectar also.

2 mangoes

2-3 kiwi

1 fresh pineapple

10-15 fresh strawberries

1/4 cup honey

4 tbsp. key lime juice

poppy seeds for funsies

Slice everything up, mix the honey and lime juice and pour over the fruit. Sprinkle on some poppy seeds if you'd like. They add some fun and let people know that it's a fruit salad. The lime gives it a bit of a kick. I used Nellie and Joe's Key West lime juice- gasp! Not fresh? Yes. I didn't have any Key Limes around and I was going for easy-peasy. So call the culinary police if you must. Even picky Amanda liked this. Enjoy....

Realization

2009-06-12T11:20:00.002-06:00

I was looking at the calendar this morning and realized that Chloe goes back to school the Thursday after we get back from vacation. We leave in about 2 weeks, we'll be gone for two weeks and then she's back to school that Thursday. Conflicting emotions abound. I've loved the schedule this year but we went on vacation a lot earlier last year. So I think I need a pro/con list.

Pros
1.Getting up at a ridiculously early hour (for the Buttons) was rough but we got through it.
2.The school was tougher academically than her last school and was good for her.
3. The parents of this school are *really* involved.
4. The overall quality of everything was a notch above her last school (which was also very highly rated).
5. Keeping Chloe in the same school is good for her because change is difficult.

Cons
1. Getting up early affected week night things like Life Group. And life in general.
2. During most of the year she had more than an hour of homework every night even though her teacher said they would have no more than 20 minutes of homework a night plus reading. I don't know of a kid that can rainbow write (every letter of every word has to be in a different color) all 20 spelling words in 20 minutes, plus math homework, plus grammar homework.
3. Her teacher was a nice person but I didn't like her attitude toward Chloe, academically speaking. Apparently Chloe's artsy-ness bothered her so when I recieved communication from her it was typically negative. Which affected Chloe's report card. How? Because grades around here are subjective. It just makes me too angry so I need to stop.

Sigh. I haven't been completely happy with any school that any of my kids have gone to. Well, Beech High School was a good school for Amanda. I was happy with that but we moved. It's difficult for Travis and I because we were both teacher's pets. Our teachers constantly heaped praise and attention on us so to have teachers that are indifferent or negative towards my kids is really hard. I guess we were spoiled. I grew up in private school and he did too until the 4th grade, I think. Home schooling is out of the question. I'm not physically able to take that on (I've been sick since the day Chloe got out of school) and we're not financially prepared for it either. So, we'll do what we always do. We'll pray about it and figure it out. Ultimately God knows what Chloe needs better than I do. I mean, it's really a miracle that she got into this school anyway. There are plenty of kids that apply year after year and don't get in. I'm really just not ready for her to be in school again. Of course, I'll be rejoicing when she gets that 3 week break in October, right?

Keeping Up

2009-06-09T17:07:00.002-06:00

So I've been trying to keep up lately...with the laundry. I know, aren't we all? Actually laundry isn't usually a huge problem around here because we have enough big people to keep up with it. If they need something washed, they just wash it. But ever since our cats left, the fleas moved in. With a vengeance. I don't like talking about fleas or looking at fleas but really, the Button household has revolved around nothing but fleas for the last 3 weeks or so. It has been the most frustrating thing ever. So, Travis sprayed the entire house again this past weekend. This is the third time but this time he emptied out every closet, took everything out from under every bed (when you live in a small house the space under beds is storage- no way around it) and vacuumed every inch of floor space in the house...and sprayed *everything* with insecticide. Now I am usually a no poison kind of gal, especially with small kids in the house but since fleas were responsible for the outbreak of the bubonic plague I more readily accepted poison in the house. Gaaa. Disgusting. And the laundry? I've washed every single comforter in the house and every pillow cushion and blanket around to get rid of flea eggs. We still have a layer of poison on the wood floors because apparently they lay eggs in the grooves- so we have to walk around with shoes on until Saturday when I can mop. Blech. We've seen a few fleas since then and Travis has said that if they show up again we're flea bombing the house. I *really* don't want to do that.

On the brighter side of things, we're leaving for Florida in 19 days! Did I mention that? Amanda's acting competition is in Orlando the end of this month and the first week in July and we're going with her. She's nervous and well, I might be a little nervous too. She definitely needs us there to walk with her and give her guidance and pray with her because we have no idea what's going to happen. She'll be competing but there will also be casting directors and that sort of thing. I think it's just nerve wracking to know that you're being watched all the time and competing and that sort of thing. But I don't have a plan yet. At this stage of the game I *always* have a plan- um, except maybe for that last trip to Florida. But she doesn't have her schedule yet which means I don't know what I'm doing or what to plan for or what to wear. And do I have to have a formal-ish dress for the award ceremony? Oh, I hope not. What days are we spending where? I don't like not having a plan. I am looking forward to it though. I'm hoping for a beach day and an amusement park day and a friend day and I'm supposed to have a looking at houses day with my mom-but I guess I'm not going to know all that for a little while yet.

So I will wait, mostly patiently, and dream of palm trees...

So....

2009-06-08T11:09:00.002-06:00

...a few weeks ago Amanda accidentally dropped her i-Pod in the toilet. Tragedy of tragedies, I know. She was so upset and I felt really bad for her. We bought it for her for Christmas and it was the new model with some new features and it was probably the nicest present we've ever bought for her. So the hunt was on for some remedy to the water inside. She went to the Mac Authority and they told her to try putting it in a bag of rice to get the moisture out (the real trick according to Travis is if you do drop an i-Pod or cellphone in water is to turn it off immediately and do not turn it back on for several days. Apparently turning it on and trying to use it fries the circuits or something like that). So she grabbed some rice from the pantry and put her beloved i-Pod in for a few days and...nothing. Bummer. But a few days after that I found the bag of rice back in the pantry. The rice that the i-Pod was in. The i-Pod that fell into the toilet. I don't think that I need to tell you that I'm not serving toilet water rice to my family. But I also thought it was reeeaaallly funny. So I wrote a little note on the bag and stuck it to her bedroom door. Hilarity ensued. She thought it was reeeaaaallly funny too. Seriously, I almost fell on the floor laughing.

Ah, a day in the life of the Buttons. My dad says that we can have fun doing *anything*. I think it's true.

Hmmm...

2009-06-04T21:35:00.002-06:00

I'm sleepy and it's 10:35. I normally don't go to bed until around 11 at least. Even when I try to get to bed earlier it's at least 11, more like 11:30. We Buttons are night owls- but you all knew that, right? I don't have much to say since I've been cooped up in the house since last week. Halle's been sick and now Trav's car is broken. It should be fixed easily enough. And I wanted to see if I could type out anything coherent when I'm this sleepy. And now everyone has come back to the bedroom and started to have a conversation with me. It's hard to type and half listen.

Chloe's birthday was today and we had big plans. We bought a little inflatable swimming pool and a slip-n-slide and a loaf of white bread. The plan was to walk to the dock and feed the fish then come home and play in the water all day. But it was overcast and chilly all.day.long. But we redeemed the day after Trav got home by taking the kids to Chuck E. Cheese to play video games.

Tomorrow we'll be stuck at home again because Trav will have my car- thankfully school is out. And the weather is supposed to be sunny. So our plans are on again- walk, swim, slide. It should be fun.

A New Dress and a Brunette

2009-06-01T17:01:00.004-06:00

Well, even though I didn't meet my goal of finishing Halle's dress *and* Chloe's dress, I did at least finish Halle's- for now. I'm pretty happy with how it turned out, even though it's far from perfect. But this is another idiot proof project- meaning it's hard for even me to mess it up completely. I do hate the ribbon ties though. I've tried a couple of projects with ribbons for ties and I just hate them. They slip out too easily so I'm sure I'll be making my own straps. Either frome the dress fabric or from bias tape. I'm sure most of you recognize this fabric. Mary and I made a quilt for Halle out of the same thing and I have yards and yards leftover. I was *really* new to sewing back then and figured that I needed enough to recover a couch.

Halle got pretty "hammy" in her posing. And here's a closer look. I'm not going to even bother pointing out all the defects. The end result is wearable and you'd have to take a really close look at it to see what's wrong so I'm happy with it. Halle kept wanting to take it off though so I'm crossing my fingers that she'll wear it.

And I'm a brunette now. Gasp! It's kind of a long story that involves me messing up my highlights but here you have it. The jury is still out on whether I'm happy with it or not. It's a pretty big change and it's kind of hard to get used to. Actually, I looked in the mirror a couple of nights ago when I did it and scared myself. No, really. But I'm supposed to see some friends soon and I think it's better to let people know ahead of time, right? Travis likes it but Amanda says I look better blonde. I think I'll be staying brunette for a while though. The upside is I'm not looking at roots all the time.

And everybody dyes their hair darker in the summer, right? Right....

Some Pictures

2009-05-30T15:56:00.003-06:00

We've wanted to go to a little park here in Franklin pretty much since we found it but for one reason or another hadn't been able to go. But this past Sunday we braved periodic bursts of rain to head out and get a look at the Harpeth River via a little walk through the woods at the park. It was muddy and buggy but it was really fun. I think it would be more fun if we had inner tubes and could just jump in.

The water is pretty and swift moving and perfect for canoeing this time of year. By the end of the summer it will be a different story since we get very little rainfall that time of year.

The rain made it misty and a bit foggy outside.

This is my new favorite picture, I think I'm going to frame it. Hmmm, just noticed Trav's shirt in the background. Drat. We've also wanted to go canoeing down the Harpeth and there are several places to put canoes in. I hear it's a nice long ride. Maybe soon.....

Online

2009-05-29T08:56:00.002-06:00

Um, yeah, I've been meaning to post, but, well...you know stuff comes up and then we had a big storm and it knocked us offline for a couple of days. The very nice AT&T repairman left a little bit ago and now I have service again. I have to say though that not having the option of checking e-mail or blogs has left me way less distracted and I like it.

The past week was positively wonderful- mostly. Last Friday (a whole week ago!) Kris and Mary kept our kiddos overnight (!) so that Trav and I could have a date night. We dropped the kids off later than we wanted to because of work and traffic and Chloe being completely grubby when I picked her up from school but it worked out nicely because we were able to go to Providence in Mt. Juliet for dinner and some shopping. I was excited because I've always had a little crush on Mt. Juliet as a place. I mean, it sounds so romantic doesn't it? And it's really pretty. But I hardly ever make the drive because it's so far from where we live. Dinner was at Ruby Tuesday's and it was fabulous. No really. It's not gourmet exactly, but I *love* their crabcakes. And I think that their menu is really fabulous. Travis got a bison burger- he loves those.

The next day we met Kris and Mary at the Pfunky Griddle. It was really nice to be out and have breakfast together. Mary mentioned that it was too hot and I wasn't really hot but as a general rule I don't get into places that you have to cook your own food. I know it's popular and other people seem to really get into it but I cook all the time. We rarely go out to eat- other than say, Chick-Fil-A, so if we're going to go out I want to have my food cooked for me while I enjoy a nice conversation with friends. Which we had- with Kris because Mary sat at a table with *all* of the kids. I'm not sure how that happened.

Memorial Day was nice and relaxed. We talked and cleaned and grilled steaks. We still have a watermelon in the cooler that we haven't cut. It always seems like a good idea but a whole watermelon for 5 people is a lot.

On Wednesday we had a really big storm. It reminded me of a Florida storm with lots of lightning and thunder. And wouldn't you know it- the weatherman said we had some sort of tropical air mass- thing. I enjoyed the storm. Mostly because I didn't have to go out in it. That afternoon I had a Dr. appt. because I wasn't feeling well but on the way Halle came down with something. Really, within an hour she went from being normal to being lethargic and sneezing and just sitting in my lap moaning about not feeling well. That kind of thing was normal with Chloe and Amanda but not with Halle. My Dr. was so concerned about her that she went ahead and checked her out while we were there. She didn't have a fever then so we decided to wait to do an antibiotic but she got progressively worse that day. And it was Life Group day and we were supposed to lead worship. And we did. I sang with Halle sitting in my lap. She rallied a bit after worship and our Life Group leader had brought some Gator Aid-pink- which helped. She's on antibiotics now and is better than she was but she's still really not feeling well.

And today....hmmm. I have plans for today. Chloe is maybe, possibly skipping school. My brain went on summer vacation two weeks ago and I can't seem to get her to bed on time. She's got two full days next week and the last day is two hours long. I'm not sure why they do that. But I'm looking forward to it. I started a little pillowcase dress last week for Halle and got stuck because I bought the wrong size bias tape. It really is the easiest thing ever and I'm getting better at the whole sewing thing. I'm determined to finish it today and make one for Chloe. If I just worked on dresses for the whole day I could probably knock out all four that I have in mind to make for them (two each). But I also have a ton of cleaning to do. So I'll try to stay balanced and have a lot to show for the end of the day. And maybe tonight I can watch something interesting and get started on finishing my grandma's quilt. It looks like she's completely sewn it together by hand- big undertaking. It's coming apart in a couple of places so that should be a piece of cake to take care of. And I guess that's all for now.

So Much Fun Stuff....

2009-05-19T12:35:00.003-06:00

This has been a fantastic day so far. And last night was really fun too. Every Monday we have family night. It was Trav's idea and it's something that everybody looks forward to. I usually try to make something fun for dinner and then Chloe reads a Bible story and then we play a game or something like that. Well, last night everybody got salad (mean mommy) and then we took a walk. Even miss Amanda walked with us. For one night a week she's a captive to family things. You'll understand when you have teenagers. The weather has been perfect for the last few days (high 60's) and we had such a great time. Then we played Super Monkey Ball. Last week Travis bought a used game cube. No, it's not a Wii but we don't have the money for that so we're not buying it. The only downside is that sometimes I get motion sickness from that game. Seriously. There's just too much going on at some points, so I had to hide in the bedroom while Travis and Chloe finished playing.

Today is a super-special day for Chloe because it's field trip day! She's been so excited about it. I wish I could have gone but for some reason this school only allows 1 (!) chaperone to go with the class. Last year I think we had about 6 chaperones. Anyway, she picked out her outfit last night and asked if she could wear a skirt. Sure, no problem. Then I saw that it was a pink and black plaid skirt. My initial reaction was to say (OK, I actually did say) no way, that doesn't match. Then she begged and I relented. Then she asked if she could wear the striped tights. I was initially horrified and then I said, "sure, why not"? Know why? Because she is a beautiful, thoughful, creative soul and it just comes out everywhere. When we get to FL, no matter what school she goes to she's going to have to wear a uniform. I personally am neither pro nor con on the uniform issue. But I think that she'll feel stifled by it- a lot. So for today my sweet little butterfly will be wearing a plaid skirt and striped leggings. And I'm OK with it. I think it's really cute.

And this morning I took Halle for a walk. We pretty much always walk the same place because I don't have to drive anywhere to do it. It's beautiful and they have a pond with fish and turtles and geese. We all love going there. When we went last night we forgot to take bread with us and the fish were really disappointed. So today I made sure to take some with us. I always feel sorry for the turtles because they just aren't fast enough to get to the little bits of bread that we drop. So I figured out that the secret is to drop *big* chunks of bread because the smaller fish can't drag the whole thing down. Does anybody know what kind of fish those are? I can name a ridiculous amount of salt water fish because I spent so much time doing that as a kid but I'm kind of clueless as to what these are. They are kind of blue so I'm going to guess that they're bluegills. Animal names are usually descriptive like that.

We also fed the fish on Saturday and for the first time ever we saw a really big carp. Trav thinks he's about 3 1/2 feet long.

I tried really hard to get some pics of him and I was pleasantly surprised. I can't wait to show these to Trav tonight. I just love these guys. I love wildlife and being outside- especially when the weather is perfect like this. This is a great day.

So....

2009-05-18T15:09:00.003-06:00

Are you tired of pictures of these things yet? Well, here are miss Kyleigh's blocks all together, finished and shipped. I'm pretty happy with the way they turned out, even though they aren't perfect. And I'm even happier that I'm done with them. It shouldn't have taken me so long to finish them but I'd get stuck on something and they'd sit for a couple of months until I'd remember them again. Thankfully Kyleigh hasn't started school yet :) Travis spilled the beans on the aprons for Landon and Cameron and I kind of meant them as a surprise. But I think they'll like using them when they bake with Shane.

When you live in a house the size of ours every little bit of space is important. There are nooks here and there where stuff is just kind of piled for lack of a better place to put it but for the most part everything has a place. I should really get rid of everything that doesn't. But for the last two and a half years that we've lived here our hallway has pretty much looked like this:

Actually that's a vast improvement of what it used to be. We used to have one laundry hamper that wasn't nearly big enough to hold dirty clothes for 5 people. We bought this laundry sorter at Costco a few months ago and I love it. It really is the best $50 I ever spent. But it left little walkway in the hall. I can't even count how many times I've caught my wrist on the hall closet door while walking by. It always *really* hurts. But since our cats departure, it opened up storage space in the laundry room and we were able to put the laundry sorter in there. Finally. So here's our walkway now:
It feels really weird to have all that space but I love it. I also love that my bathroom (laundry and bathroom are together) doesn't smell like cat litter- or worse. When I walked in there this morning I actually noticed that the bathroom smelled *good*- vanilla coconut- heavenly compared to what it was.

Can you guess what these guys are? The pile of seeds under the plants probably gives it away. Pumpkins. Yes, pumpkins. Last fall when my decorative pumpkin was starting to go bad I tossed it out in the back yard because I'd heard that deer like to eat the inside. I don't think any deer nibbled on it but the seeds were all left behind after the pumpkin decomposed. So now I have little pumpkin plants- I think I counted 8 in all. Travis almost mowed them down last night not realizing what they were. So I guess we'll see how it goes. Could I be lucky enough to get more than one pumpkin this year? My fingers are crossed....

Happy Thoughts

2009-05-14T17:32:00.003-06:00

OK, enough moping already. Today was tougher than I expected but I'm a lot better now. I've been cleaning up all the cat nastiness that has literally covered every flat surface in the house and I feel better. I want to remember the good stuff but cleaning flea bits and hair and general gross stuff helps me to keep the rose colored glasses off. And the fact that I feel a lot better helps too. I'd even developed a backache in the past few days. I started to suspect that it was cat related because when I made them sleep outside my backache lessened. Well, last night I took Benadryl because of seasonal allergies (why, oh, why must I also be allergic to trees? I love them so...) and guess what? No more backache. It's not scientific proof but I joked with Trav that if we kept them I'd soon be in a wheel chair. Maybe it was just the stress of the whole thing.

Anyway, isn't this just the sweetest bird's nest ever? Chloe found it on the ground a few days ago (which is important because it's actually illegal to take a bird's nest from a tree) along with this remnant of a shell. I've since donated it to Chloe's class but it's enough to put a smile on my face.

As are the new leaves on my lemon tree. This guy had a tough winter. I didn't really take care of him like I should have and he was blasted with hot air from the heater for pretty much the whole winter so about two inches on the top are actually dead. I didn't know if he'd pull through so these new leaves made me really happy.

I hate May because of allergies but I *love* it because that's when my rosebush blooms. These are the prettiest pink blooms I've seen in these here parts. I've seen lots of red ones and a few light pink ones but these are my fave. I keep thinking I'll try to take a cutting and root it.

My sunflowers courtesy of my friendly neighborhood birds. I'm thankful because it's actually kind of difficult to get the seeds out of the sunflowers. These guys are growing too close together and are between a 2 x 4 and the patio. I think I'm just going to try to get the 2 x 4 out and see how it goes. I hate pulling them up- but stunted plants that don't flower aren't much fun either. We'll see how it goes.

And just for giggles...we've had so much rain lately that my door mat has actually sprouted plant life. I've never seen this before. My guess is that there were weed seeds in the mat that sprouted because of the constant moisture. Now I'm off to eat dinner and Chloe has requested that we take a walk around Downtown Franklin tonight. That is sure to keep the smile on my face.

I Should Add...

2009-05-14T06:56:00.003-06:00

I've been asked a couple of times if the cats are in a place that the girls could visit and the answer to that is no. We aren't telling the girls where they are because we think that it's easier for them that way. They are in a place that they need to be adopted though. I can't even begin to tell you how difficult it is to find a place to take cats. There are so many out there and it doesn't matter how wonderful yours are, they just aren't taking them. And I'm going on about them but I really do want them to find a loving home again so if you know anybody in this area that wants a cat let me know and I'll e-mail you.

I mentioned that I made them spend Monday night outside because I couldn't take it anymore. Well, these are inside cats, they like to go outside but they aren't equipped to stay there. Tuesday morning they were crying to get inside and Phoenix started climbing the front screen door. I guess he figured out that I would take him inside if he didn't stop. Of course I did and the first thing he did was look for the litter box. He's big but he's a baby.

Apparently none of them slept that night because when I let them all back in so I could get them ready to go they passed out.

I let the girls have their pictures taken with them all one last time so we could remember them. This is Bailey and she lets the girls carry her around like Phoenix does. They were both so paitent with them. Sometimes she'd cry to get into the girls room to play with them.

And this is Sophie. I was her human. For some reason she loved me more than anyone else. A lot of times I lay across the bed on my stomach when I'm reading the Bible and praying. She would often lay on the small of my back and purr. Other times she'd take a nap with me. She's not as good with small kids as the others are. Probably because when she was a kitten Halle would pick her up by her head and carry her around. She likes big people much better. But she also fetches. Yes, really. She likes to chase those tabs from milk jugs so if you toss one in the room she'll bring it back. She doesn't always get it all the way back to you but close.

So I guess I'm done. I really didn't think that I'd have such a hard time with this but I really miss them. I just want them to find a good home. What I really want is to not be allergic to cats but I don't think I'm going to get that.

Saying Goodbye...

2009-05-12T17:03:00.003-06:00

Sad but true...our kitties said goodbye tonight. It's a long story but (with help from a few friends) I came to realize that most (if not all) of my current health issues are related to the cats. I never knew that being allergic to an animal could make somebody so sick. But they did and after weeks of searching we've found a new home for them. Even though I was sad that they had to go, I'm pretty excited now. I actually made them spend the night outside last night because I couldn't take it anymore. And you know what? For the first time in I don't know how long, I woke up without feeling like I had the flu or with a headache. I actually went for a walk this morning instead of sleeping the moring away just to get up feeling like I'd been hit by a truck. The difference was immediate and amazing. I actually expected it to take much longer to feel better.

This is Halle with Phoenix and they looked this way pretty much every time they were together.

Chloe with Phoenix...sniff. And well, I guess these are all of Phoenix.
There were more than a few tears today but I think that tomorrow will look much brighter.

Mother's Day

2009-05-11T11:36:00.005-06:00

I would just like to take a moment to say that I *love* Mother's Day! Well, I wish it could be a better day for my mom though. My brother and I can't always get to their house for the day. It's a lot easier for us but we were just there for Easter so we couldn't make another trip. Trav's mom has his brothers and sister so she's able to spend it with family but we haven't spent a Mother's Day with her since the first year we got married. OK, all that said, I had a wonderful, amazing, fantastic day.

My only real request was that I not have to make *anything*. I do love cooking and making wonderful things for everybody but I wanted a day off. OK, my other request was that we have Publix subs because I haven't had one in a *really* long time. I love Publix subs, mmmmm. And I wanted to be outside. So I guess I had three requests. I really, really wanted to go to Fall Creek Falls to go hiking. But I really felt like we should be at church. That probably sounds odd but I don't really like to go to church on Mother's Day. It probably stems from the fact that I've heard no less than two dozen sermons on the Proverbs 31 woman and how we should be like her. But when I was a single mom and in college it really didn't apply and was just really painful. So I'd take Amanda to the beach or something. So we got to church late. Even though I knew I was supposed to be there I still drug my feet. And the service was amazing. Pastor Dale had some great insight and felt that God wanted to set people free and bring healing and that's what we went after. Then he preached about drawing from the well of living water. It was so appropriate and beautiful and I was so thankful that we went. Oh, and helpful too. There is no way to be what Proverbs 31 says we should without drawing from that well.

Then it was on to Publix and the zoo! The weather was overcast and perfect for walking around. We decided to do the loop around the animals in the reverse order that we usually do so that we could spend time looking at things that we usually whiz by because we've gotten too tired to see the rest of it. So we let the kiddos go to the petting zoo.

And the playground. We really had a fabulous time climing the rope, um, thingy. At the top of the enclosure there is a slide that is, of course, really tall and really dark. It was so fun. And the second time I went up there was a man standing there and he asked me "do you think our big butts will fit down that thing"? To which I replied, "well, my big butt just went down so you're probably OK". But later on I really wished that I'd slugged him. Who says that to a woman? Even if she has a big butt you still shouldn't say it. OK, I'm over it now.

I was also treated to the most wonderful presents. A night of babysitting from Amanda plus a Starbuck's gift card, AN ALTON BROWN DVD COLLECTION from Trav (! I had to shout it because I'm soooo excited), and a handmade, handpainted plate from Chloe. She made it herself in art class at school. I will treasure it always and proudly display it, even when she's 45. I really have the most amazing family ever. I am ridiculously blessed.

Mmmm, Cookies

2009-05-06T11:33:00.002-06:00

I watched Martha today, well at least part of it. And she had a baker from NYC that makes baked goods that are vegan and gluten free. Yum, right? I think it would take a while for me to amass all the alternative ingredients to bake one of these goodies but I think it would be worth it. You can find the recipes here. Enjoy!

I'm Too Excited!!!

2009-05-01T14:43:00.002-06:00

Amanda's first commercial, or trailer came out. A few months ago a friend of hers from Governor's School asked her to be in a commercial for a book that was being shot in Franklin. So you can view it here. Her part starts at minute 4. I couldn't be more excited for her. Actually, I think I'm a little bit more excited than she is. I'm just really happy that she's getting to do something she loves at least on a small scale. I hope you enjoy it.

A Good Day to Be a Button Girl

2009-05-01T10:38:00.004-06:00

It was mile run time for Chloe's school yesterday. I know I blogged about it last year but I can't seem to find it. She told me that her goal was to run it in 12 minutes but it took her 19 minutes to run it in Monday's practice. That let me know that she really needed a running buddy and since my health isn't quite to the point that I can run a mile with her, I asked Amanda to do it. And surprisingly she said yes. I say surprisingly because up until this point Amanda has shunned anything that involved a) getting sweaty and b) getting up early. But yesterday she got up as soon as her alarm clock went off and got ready to go.

Here she is being a bit grumbly because it was chilly outside. But she and Halle soon were able to pump themselves up for the run. And they're off! Chloe, my sweet little Chloe is *always* at the back of the pack. She's just not a really fast runner. But she's steady. She picks a pace and keeps it the entire way around- just like her teachers tell her to do. The rest of the pack shoots off and half way through are ready to call it quits but Chloe just keeps running.

Then at the end she's able to sprint to the finish and ends up beating a bunch of kids that she was behind to begin with. She was really proud of herself. And she finished in 11:22, beating her goal and her run time from last year by about 2 minutes! Yes, I was proud of her.

Then a little later that day I took Halle to have lunch with Chloe at school.

The girls were both really excited and Chloe's classmates cornered us in the locker area to see Halle make herself burp. Did I ever mention that's a thing that she taught herself? The kids loved it.

The other reason we were at school was because Chloe is star of the week and had the opportunity to share anything that she wanted with the class. Well, she picked Halle. I thought it was really sweet. So Chloe had Halle share 3 nursery rhymes that she taught her- Jack and Jill, Hickory Dickory Dock, and Humpty Dumpty. Which she shared perfectly. Those of you that have met Halle know what a huge improvement this is. She wouldn't talk to anybody, much less perform in front of a bunch of people. Then Chloe asked her to burp for the whole class. At least her teacher thought it was funny. I'm not really sure why Chloe looks like she's snarling in this picture.

So all in all it was a good day to be a Button girl.

Smoosh

2009-04-29T09:58:00.003-06:00

I have a tendency to smoosh several blog posts into one because I don't blog everyday. I wish I did. I know bloggers that blog nearly every day and I get disappointed when they don't blog. I mean, I'm not doing it but I like knowing what's going on. Maybe I'm nosy. Or maybe the constant bloggers should just take it as a compliment that I like reading their stuff. Anyway, let the smooshing begin.

I think I kind of left everybody hanging a couple of posts ago. I wasn't ready to jump off a bridge or anything I just had to face some things. It's amazing what happens when you do. First of all you might find out even more than you thought you already knew. I'm just going to be vague on that for a while. But if any of us sit down and have some coffee sometime I'd be happy to spill it. The internet is really public. And the second thing is that when you face your fears, really look them in the eye you realize that they're just a vapor. So I've done it and I'm not freaked out anymore by who finds me or what happens. I'm ready to do whatever, whenever.

My hubby has been out of town since Sunday, in Monticello, KY on a business trip (so I'm positive that he's not having any fun, poor guy). I was a bit mopey on Sunday and Monday but yesterday I was able to talk myself out of it and have fun with the kiddos. I'm trying to do a better job of raising the girls purposefully and spend less time just wasting time with this or that. I read a little note on my former voice teacher's web page that was inspirational. Because I really do feel like when I'm spending time with my family I'm often distracted. So yesterday morning Halle and I spent time outside (in our pj's) and she picked lots of "flowers" for me. I know they were weeds but it was so sweet. And then later I took Chloe and Halle to the park and then we planted stuff. Finally. We could have planted earlier, I think but I still remember that freakish freeze we had in April a couple of years ago. So we planted yellow pear tomato seeds and mini carrots. And that was all we had time for. It takes a while to get those teensy little seeds in the ground if you're being careful. That's probably why most people buy plants that are already successful. But I can't afford that. Tomorrow (hopefully the rain will stop) we'll plant pansies (also and edible by the way) and basil and possibly small sugar pumpkins. I'm not sure if it's time to plant those yet. The package says that they're perfect for pies and such- we'll see. I know I didn't have much success with pumpkins last year but I didn't know what kind of pumpkin it was and I'm pretty sure I drowned it. I read online that they need lots and lots of water but they were talking giant pumpkins so I have my fingers crossed. I have quite a few sunflowers growing from last year because birds are messy eaters and they dropped seeds all over the place. Unfortunately they're growing in spots that they can't possibly survive. It's hard for me to pull up plants- which is why I stink at gardening. It kills me to think that I'm taking a living plant and pulling it out of the ground by the roots to let it slowly die from lack of nutrients. I know it's not a person but I still hate it.

Here are my weed flowers from my sweet little Halle. She gets such joy from giving them to me and they actually smell good.

I think they look sweet in a little bud vase in the window. That's one of the reasons I bought these. The other reason was to fill them with cranberries and a white tapered candle for Thanksgiving. But I didn't end up staying here for Thanksgiving. And as a side note- yellow is totally my new color! I have this habit of picking a new color that I'm infatuated with every couple of years. For the last few years it's been turquoise but this year it's yellow. I remember yellow being my color in 7th grade too. I had yellow lipstick ladies! Really. It was the '80's after all.

I decided that I'd try peat pots this year for planting (except for the carrots). I never, ever get the spacing right when I sow a bunch of seeds right into planters so I'm hoping that this will help. The roots of the plants will grow right through these so you can just stick the whole thing into the ground.

Chloe was so excited. She begged and begged to do "some planting". I really hope that I have some success with this stuff. I don't like tomatoes but I'm hoping that yellow pear tomatoes taste better raw than the red ones- blech. And I thought that yellow salsa would be fun. I don't think that anyone would go for yellow pizza sauce though. Crossing my fingers for carrots and pumpkins and basil and pansies. Hopefully at least a few. And Travis is coming home tonight so I'm going to do some marathon house cleaning...fun.

Catch-Up or Bah-humbug

2009-04-27T08:35:00.005-06:00

I pretty much wrote an entirely different post this morning...and then my internet went down and I lost it. I probably don't need to tell you that I have no motivation to re-write it. So here's the run-down.

This is Amanda's birthday brunch. I bought the muffins and quiche but nobody seemed to mind that they weren't homemade.Especially the little ones that are carb-aholics.Manda blew out the candles on a triple layer chocolate cheesecake made by my mom.Here are the previously promised pics of the girls and I in our Easter outfits. Chloe picked out my dress. I don't think I would have picked it but it looked nice on. And it made her *really* happy that I decided to buy that one.Homemade pizza for Manda's birthday. Guess which side is for the grown-ups?And Trav with his little girls. Amanda had to stay home and work.
And thus concludes our tour...maybe I'll get a chance to post a more thoughtful, uninterrupted post tomorrow.

I Smell the Sound of Sweetness Baking

2009-04-21T08:45:00.000-06:00

That's what Travis just said to me. Of course he meant that he smells homemade brownies in the oven. It's upside down nature made me think of things that were already swirling around in my mind though. For one- Facebook. That ultimate time stealer (if you let it) and artificial people finder. Not that I should be too critical, I've found several people that I really care about and have even been able to write some encouraging words to friends that needed it. The problem is that I haven't really wanted to be found. Found by college friends is OK, those were good memories. But I didn't want to be found by people I went to high school with. I don't know about you guys but high school was the most wretched, horrible experience of my life. Well, besides just growing up. I think my life started falling apart in 5th grade. No, I'm not kidding. That was my first experience with friends turning on me and spreading rumors about me. 6th grade was actually better because I went to public school that year and everyone was really nice to me. But I begged to go back to private school because it was all I had known. It just goes to show you that kids really don't know what's best for them.

I moved away from Lakeland. It was really all I could think about during my college years. I didn't want to see or hear from anyone I knew growing up. They knew my mistakes but they didn't know who I was. I wanted to get away from my ex-husband and make sure that Amanda was safe. For those of you that don't know my teenage years went like this- I played every sport imaginable, had my daughter at 17, got married at 18 (to my drug dealing boyfriend that promised he'd changed) and divorced him at 19. My divorce was final 3 days before my 20th birthday. The hearing date went like this- I was in college. Because I was getting divorced my counselor felt that a full load would be too much so I had classes at 11:10, 12:20 & 1:30. So that morning I went to court, got divorced, cried driving down the road, my ex-passed me and laughed at me and I made it to my 11:10 class. That afternoon I went to my job at Wal-Mart. That evening I was sitting in the break room thinking about the day and it felt like I should tell somebody, anybody what happened. But I knew that nobody would care. So I didn't.

In January 1993 was when I really got serious about my relationship with God. I was at youth group and the pastor, Mike Tedder- a man that I will be forever grateful to for so many things- gave an "altar call" and I was the first one out of my seat and up at the front. I threw my hands in the air and said "God I don't have anything left to offer you but my life. Take it and do whatever you want to with it". And it's been that way ever since. The next month God called me to ministry. If your familiar with my (former) denomination at all, you know that a divorced person has no place in ministry. Whether or not there are Biblical grounds. I'm not going into it all but I had all the Biblical grounds I needed. This would prove to be a faith builder my entire college career.

Back to Lakeland. My ex got much, much worse. He was arrested for selling drugs several times and even confessed to a mediator (we were seeing her about a visitation spat) that he was selling crack but in the state of FL that is not enough to terminate visitation rights for a child. I knew that my only option was to play along and wait until he got tired of putting forth the effort to see Amanda. I had to quit acting like anything he did bothered my while simultaneously being the biggest, um, rhymes with witch, that I could. It turns out that I was pretty good at it. But I was also very concerned for her safety. Lakeland felt like a prison and I couldn't wait to leave, burn the bridge and only go back for Christmas. It's funny how bridges get rebuilt without your permission.

Back to Facebook. I've been found by a few people that were peripheral and also by someone that made my life miserable. Oh, plus my ex-husband is "Facebooking" now and is friends with the one that made me miserable. And I have to say that I haven't freaked out. The Lord has given me peace. I should probably add that my husband adopted Amanda on election day 2000. She's been safe for a long time. Actually, she's been safe all along. But I did remember every single reason that I hate Lakeland and never, ever wanted to go back.

Do you ever wish that God would just leave well enough alone? Does every single area of my life have to be completely plowed up so that I have to take a good hard look at it? Can't I just forget that my former life existed and live here? A few thoughts came to me though as I was thinking (maybe, possibly pitching a fit about it) and praying. The first thing is that God wants me to fear nothing. There is nothing that man can do to me. People can gossip and hurt me but I'm different and I have an amazing support system now and God gives us wisdom to deal with things. And maybe those same people have grown up the way that I have. I'm not really giving anybody any credit if I think that after 18 years they aren't any more grown up than they were in high school. And the other thing is this- how will God's glory be displayed if I don't stick around for that to happen? I said this before but they knew what I did but they didn't know who I was. And they certainly don't know who I am. The only way that a person can get from so broken to whole is by Christ. There isn't an amount of counseling that can fix problems so deep that only God can get to it. I believe that the purpose for our moving is for restoration. Restoration for our families, restoration for people that we knew a long time ago, and restoration for people we haven't met yet. Facebook wasn't my issue, being found wasn't my issue- fear is my issue. And we'll face it, God and Travis and Amy. And we'll walk it out together.

This is pretty heavy duty stuff so maybe later I'll post about those brownies. Which coincidentally were pretty heavy duty. Maybe it was the stick and a half of butter.

Late Update...

2009-04-20T15:29:00.003-06:00

I didn't even know what to title this post since I've been back home for over a week now but late and update rhyme and for some reason made me giggle so that's that.

Since I got zoo passes for my birthday I was determined to go to the B'ham zoo because they have a reciprocal agreement and I get to go for free- yay! I hadn't been to this zoo since Chloe was a baby and it was nice to be back. Overall I like the Nashville Zoo better but it was still a nice day outdoors and the B'ham zoo has a few things that Nashville doesn't.

Like a train!

On our way in, someone was kind enough to give Chloe and Halle tokens so they could ride. And our engineer was very hammy and really seemed to enjoy the attention and having his picture taken. Which I think is better than a grouchy conductor.They also have flamingos...I love them. And I haven't seen any in a really long time.We also went out to eat on this trip...a lot. I think it's my parents favorite thing to do. At one point they decided they wanted to go to Red Lobster and I very eloquently talked them out of it. I think my exact words were "you people are crazy"! I was really just teasing them but we did already have food ready in a crockpot. I'm just not used to eating out that much, except for Chick-Fil-A. Anyway, it was really nice.
We ended the week with Travis getting into town and he and I took an amazing walk Friday morning. The park we used to go to has an amazing walking trail. It goes through the woods and up and down hills. There was an overlook at one point and we realized we were up higher than the roof of a house. And we had a date at California Pizza Kitchen. I highly recommend it. I've only been twice but I've loved the pizza both times. Last time was a vegetarian pizza with Japanese Eggplant on honey wheat crust- delish! It would have been better with sausage. And this time it was Chipotle Chicken on the same crust- outstanding! Spicy but wonderful. And if you can drink sugary drinks, the peach tea is amazing. Then we headed over to Big Mountain Coffee that I've told you about before. It was a little disappointing. They've changed some things and it wasn't really the same. The coffee was still really good but there was no live music and they've added a TV that was playing Nickelodeon. Bummer. But it was a nice night out for us.

Then we spent Easter there too. Minus Amanda- she had to work. I had actually forgotten that it was Easter so I didn't have any dress clothes to wear. So, of course I had to go shopping. I bought a dress for the first time in four years! It's not that I don't like dresses and I have some skirts but it was nice to be able to buy an actual dress. And earrings (I don't even remember the last time I wore earrings and apparently my ears didn't either because they gave me some trouble) and pumps! Wow! I felt like a real girl. Mom was sweet enough to do Easter baskets, dresses, shoes and hairbows for the girls. A picture, you say? You'd like to see a picture? Well, I'd love to show you one but Blogger is giving me trouble again and I can't really move them around. So maybe with my next post I'll show you a picture. I'm really tempted to try out another blogging site...

Now I'm off to have family night. I think we're going to enjoy this wonderful weather at the park. Fun...

Need.Coffee.Now.

2009-04-15T07:20:00.003-06:00

It's time. Time to get back into a schedule and leave the days of sleeping in behind. The only problem is I'm so darn tired. I don't really have trouble waking up and really, 6:55 isn't too terribly early. The problem is staying awake after that- blah. But Halle slept until 11 yesterday morning and that means that she's up late (midnight-ish) and I'm up late and Travis goes to bed by himself...not ideal. So I'm trying to get us on a better schedule. Which means I have to drink coffee apparently. There is no way I can stay awake by myself. The other upside is that I have more energy for working out.

I got Halle up at 8:00 and she hardly opened her eyes. I put her on the couch so that I could drink the aforementioned coffee and she said "it's not comforble". So she fell into a crumpled heap in the floor. Very cute but she's foiling my attempt at a schedule. And I'm not staying up until midnight tonight.

Back to the week at my parent's house. The first day we spent mostly at Best Buy. Well, it seemed that way anyway. Thankfully they had a Wii set up for demonstration and the girls and I played Mario Cart. It was really fun; we should get one of those someday.

The next day we spent mostly at Bass Pro Shop. Normally it's not my cup of tea but out of deference to my dad I thought we'd check it out. He usually spends hours sitting on mall benches or taking naps in his car while we shop with my mom so I thought this was a nice compromise. And I actually, really, had a lot of fun. This particular store is enormous (bigger than the one in Nashville) and had an eating area. Dad got the girls ice cream cones and we sat at a table and watched mom and Chloe play checkers and talked for quite a while. We spent longer than we meant to there. And then we headed off to meet my Aunt and Uncle for dinner.

All in all it was a great day and from this point I only had to wait two more days until Travis joined us. He was able to take Friday off thankfully. And he might possibly have been miserable without us...

I Meant to Mention...

2009-04-13T14:10:00.005-06:00

that I was leaving for Birmingham for the week. So, hey, guess what? I went to Birmingham for the week. It was really a last minute thing but I decided to spend the last week of Chloe's spring break with my parents (she gets 3). I really needed to get out of town but I didn't want to drive to B'ham all by myself, plus I'd be leaving Travis and Amanda with one vehicle so it wouldn't have worked. So Travis and I met mom and dad about half way between here and there and they took the two little girls and I to their house. It was nice and relaxing. We went lots of places and watched *a lot* of Food Network. Chloe was ecstatic to watch Unwrapped. She shushed us when we talked through Iron Chef America. I'll give you a little peek of what we did now because it takes way too long for my computer to upload photos- darn DSL.

See these sweet tulips Travis got me when I was sick? It was so sweet. He had to work all day, go to the store to buy essentials on his way home and still bought flowers for me.This has nothing to do with spring break but this is the view from my bedroom window this time of year. And this year I can actually see it.Our second day into the trip we took the kids to the mall to ride the carousel.What I really want you to notice though is how long their hair is...Because on day 4 we cut it off. Sigh. Chloe has been begging for a while to have her hair cut off for locks of love. She hates her long hair and cries every single time I brush it. Just before we left for B'ham Travis told me to get it cut before he got there because he figured that he couldn't handle watching it. So here are the Button girls with newly short hair. They both love it and Halle no longer has to throw her hair over her shoulder when she goes potty. Yep, it was *that*long. Chloe's hair seems to not have as much curl and Halle's hair seems a lot thicker and less blonde. But my not cutting their hair won't keep them from growing up, will it?So there's more updating to do and I'll get to it shortly.

Spring Break Snapshot

2009-03-30T17:28:00.008-06:00

Ah, Spring Break-the break we've been waiting for since Christmas break was over. There's really too much to tell so I'll just offer a little overview of what we've been doing at the Button Casa.

This is Spring Girl. Chloe's school had dress up week the week preceding spring break and this is what we came up with. She wanted to be Word Girl but I'm not skilled enough to make a costume. I wanted her to be Vernal Equinox girl but she didn't like that idea. I thought it was clever.

We've taken quite a few walks lately and finally took Travis with us when we walked around the neighborhood close to us. They have a walkway around their lake and back into the woods but I've never gone back there by myself before. And we found the sweetest little stream. Chloe and I climbed across on a log but Trav got stuck helping Halle "go potty". I think I got the better deal.We also took advantage of the beautiful weather to take the kiddos to the park. The fresh air was amazing. And while the girls played, Travis and I had a chance to talk- nearly uninterrupted. And last week I took the kiddos to the zoo. I think that since it's been so cold the animals started missing the people because they really put on a show for us. The monkeys were *loud*. And the giraffe got as close as he possibly could to us. I've been disappointed in the past because they've just hung out at the back of their enclosure but this guy really seemed to like the attention. Amanda really didn't want to leave him.

The Lorikeets were fun, of course.
And all the girls got to feed them.

Even little miss Halle. But I don't have a picture because I was holding her up. Aren't they pretty?

They have a new baby tiger exhibit. Be still my heart! They were just the sweetest things ever. Especially this little one. She got right up at the front of her enclosure and played with her toys to the delight of all of us standing there trying to get pictures. We've really had a nice time although we've been dealing with illness. Halle woke up sick on zoo day (ah the guilt) and it culminated in a 104 degree fever and vomiting Friday morning. A fever that high was not at all unusual for Chloe but Halle has never run a fever that high before. I actually ended up giving her a luke warm shower to get it to come down. My mom used to have to do that to me and it was pure torture. I swore I'd never do that to my own kids but the fever was making her throw up so I couldn't get her to keep down her medicine or cold liquids. The shower worked quickly though and I was grateful. By the time we got to the Dr. she was jumping up and down and acting like her (mostly) normal self. So they tested her for everything and she had...a cold. A cold? Really? All that drama for a cold? Yep. They ruled out strep and the flu and pneumonia- thankfully.

So as soon as this sickness bug passes (I may have picked up something from miss Halle) we'll be back to taking walks and hopefully another zoo venture. I'm looking forward to it.

Inspiration

2009-03-20T11:16:00.003-06:00

I'm pretty sure that I've already mentioned my love for my new Coastal Living subscription. Sadly, it took the place of Cottage Living when the mag shuttered but thankfully they still have a lot of cottage style *and* it's beachy to boot, what could be better? Of course, some of you have never lived near the coast and might not like a beachy style at all but Trav and I love it. I have to say that I'm very thankful that Trav and I have similar decorating styles. Unlike some guys, he definitely has an opinion so I'm glad our styles mesh. And if they don't I can usually bring him around to my side- as long as I don't go Victorian crazy or anything ornate, there would be no hope for that. Anyway, I've got five minutes to blog before I have to get ready to get Chloe from school (she'll be on her 3 week spring break after today-yay!) and I think I can do this...so here goes.

I look at this as a variation of Mary's outdoor bed idea. I've decided that I'm definitely going to have some sort of sleeping apparatus at whatever point I have a back porch. Outside naps are positively delightful. As are these beautiful turquoise covered cushions.

Oh for a house with doors and walls like these. I could live without the tarpons on the walls (I'm pretty sure that's what kind of fish those are. My mom caught one once-sort of- I'll have to tell you that story some other time). I can smell the sea breezes already.

I love the relaxed feel of this kitchen. It's somewhat lacking in counter space but that porch door on the pantry is lovely. I'm not sure how much cooking I'd do at the beach anyway.

And the master bedroom that sits in a converted porch. I actually love all the white with my-favorite-color green accents.
You can find their current issue here. I've got lots more ideas to file away under "maybe one day I'll have a house with lots of character". But until then a girl can dream....

A Walk

2009-03-17T19:30:00.003-06:00

This morning I went for a walk. Yep, I was surprised too. I dropped Chloe off at school and came home and wanted to go back to sleep. I thought I could read my Bible and pray...and drift off to sleep, because that is surely what would happen. Or I could take 45 minutes to myself and have a nice walk. It was 37 degrees but it was that cold that you know won't hang around. And it was crazy-foggy outside. So I headed off and noticed how very many dogs we have in our neighborhood; they're a noisy bunch. And I headed off to the picture-perfect-disney-esque neighborhood across the street.

White picket fences and all... I really love the style of homes they have there and I daydream of living in something like it one day. But they only have tiny little side yards and well, I want the kids to have room to play and I like to grow stuff so it would have to be something else that looks like this.

The forsythia is in full bloom. I don't know if this stuff grows in Florida. I love it.

And as I walked around their "lake" I noticed a few perfectly formed spider webs that had caught plenty of dew.

I really tried to catch the steam of the fog and dew being burned off by the sun. It was so nice and relaxing. The birds were singing again (I forget that we miss that all winter) and it was just wonderful. I'm thinking of doing it again tomorrow.

Nearly Instant Almost De-Brownification

2009-03-16T16:03:00.003-06:00

Last night I decided that I was going to focus on cleaning the kitchen. I'm hosting a Bible study here Wednesday night and thought that I'd focus on one room and get it completely done before I moved on. Then I looked at my china cabinet. I shouldn't have, really. But I did it anyway. I painted the inside blue. I've wanted to forever and the mood just hit me and I went with it. For the first time ever though, I picked one small thing that I could finish in an evening. So here are the pics.

I roughed it up with sandpaper, wiped it down and put on a coat of primer....I was a little nervous at this point.

After coat #2 of primer...

And finished for now with two coats of Scandinavian Sky by Olympic. I knew it would match the existing paint because we picked this one and the one we ended up using off the same paint chip. I just had this little sample paint pot lying around and wanted to use it. I love the way it makes the aqua goblets stand out and I'm definitely going to paint the rest of it. I'm thinking white with faux glass handles right now but I haven't been shopping yet. I like it.

Much to Say

2009-03-11T12:16:00.004-06:00

There's much to share and I've been a bit preoccupied lately. Things are getting pretty intense here as far as praying and listening and receiving direction about our lives. I think we're hearing some things and getting some direction but it's kind of like seeing hills in the distance. It looks like a big green mountain until you get closer and can pick out the individual trees. On the one hand I'm happy that God is doing things and the intensity is a necessary part of that. But on the other hand I hate to feel unsettled, like everything could change in one instant so I walk around feeling like a fish out of water. Everything seems strange; like I'm stepping out over a cavern on a bridge with no rails. I guess that would be more than strange...but you get the idea. I'm not scared- I rarely get scared at times like this. On the contrary, I get excited. But I feel the Lord saying "count the cost" and it makes me think. I'm not a naive little girl anymore that thinks just because God's called me to do something it's going to be all butterflies and rainbows. I think that whatever it is, it will be *amazing*- and really hard. But what is the alternative? I told God when I was 19 that He could take my life and do whatever He wanted to with it so I can't just take it back. Not that I want to. It's just that I've been around this block enough to know that it's going to be hard.

At our church, we read the Bible through every year. We have a set schedule so every year at this time we're reading through the exodus and following the Israelites into the promised land. The point that they're at right now is after they rebel and have to wander in the wilderness for forty more years. But once they reached the promised land- once they crossed over the Jordan river, they didn't exactly get a break. They didn't get to sit by the pool, kick up their heels and drink Mai-Tais. Nope. They had to fight. Yes, God fought for them but they still had to swing the sword themselves. And they had to do it over and over and over again until they had run out enough inhabitants that they could actually live in the promised land. I think in the past I've mentally stopped at the promised land part and have overlooked the fighting for it afterwards.

So, I think spiritually we're fighting for it now and we will be fighting for it after we see God's promises fulfilled. I want a break, really. I need a vacation at the beach with waves and sand and sun with the burden that we've carried for such a long time removed. I think I'll get it. And then I'll pick up my sword and fight some more. That's the nature of the life we live. In some ways I'd love for someone to tell me that I get to move to Key West and walk on the beach in a flowy skirt and sandals for the rest of my life and live in peace and security. And the rest of me knows that I'd go crazy in about two weeks. That's the nature of the call to serve Christ. You can never be content not making a difference somewhere. So we wait, sometimes patiently, sometimes impatiently for whatever this thing is to happen. I'm excited and nervous and peaceful and am anticipating amazing things to come.

So Last Night...

2009-03-11T11:49:00.003-06:00

...I sat on the couch watching The Biggest Loser while eating Cappuccino Fudge Blitz ice cream. The real stuff- with sugar- I almost felt bad about it. Almost. I know, I know, but I haven't really had *real* ice cream in months (OK, I had a little bit of vanilla ice cream at Tisra's birthday party). Anyway, it was really, really good. I saw my Dr. this morning as a check up to see how the medicine is doing and I'm doing pretty well, not really losing weight (I swear I hardly ever eat ice cream) but I'm not irritable or depressed, the brain fog is gone and I'm getting sick less often. Overall, it's been pretty successful as far as how I feel. But she upped my dosage to 3 times a day and said that I should really start losing weight. I want to be hopeful about that- really- but I'm just sort of burned out on the whole thing. I'm discouraged about working out because I'll get two really good weeks in before I get sick and stay sick for a month and then I have to start all over. I noticed yesterday that my hand and forearm were sore. I tried to remember what in the world I'd done- then I remembered. I cut up a sweet potato. Seriously? Am I in that bad of shape that cutting a sweet potato strains my muscles. I'm sure that I just need to start and I'll feel better. I'm not getting on the bathroom scale though. Every time I do I get frustrated so I'm not doing it. If my pants get so big that they start falling off I might, but not before then. Sorry, I didn't really mean for this to be a rant.

Speaking of sweet potatoes, I've decided that I love them in fry form. Baked fries of course. I love them best with olive oil and sea salt and that's it. We grilled pork chops for family night on Monday and I made sweet potato fries for me and roasted red potatoes for everybody else. Travis will eat them but the kids won't touch them- too bad, that's more for me! Oh, family night? We have it on Mondays and it involves us eating together, Chloe usually reads a story from her Bible and then we watch a movie or play a game. We've played Scene It, Disney edition the last several times and Chloe and I have won the last 6 games (we play as a team). I actually thought we were going to lose last time and I was happy, until we pulled it out as Travis was two spaces away from the end. But I can't let him win because he'd know and he wouldn't like it. I'm sure as the days get longer we'll take it outside to fly kites and go to the park and such.

I finished the aprons. It took less fixing than I originally thought and I'm pretty pleased with the results. The straps work pretty well and I don't think they'll slip out. They're pretty thick since the fabric is kind of a denim. They're stiff too since I starched them- it will probably help to wash them. I took pictures of the whole process but you guys that sew don't really need to know how to make a strap. I figured out how to do it by watching one of the gals at the last Girls in Stitches get together. That's usually how I figure things out. I should probably visit an art gallery soon to get some inspiration since I haven't been painting at all. Or maybe I'll just keep sewing for a while. I don't mind being a jack-of-all crafts, master of none. I doubt I'll stick with anything forever but it's all fun.

Poor Halle and Pictures

2009-03-06T18:31:00.004-06:00

My poor little Halle. Last night she dove onto my bed and unfortunately her head hit the edge of my metal sewing box. It's not really a sewing box but a decorative box that a Christmas gift came in a couple of years ago. It took me a while to figure out what was going on because of all the crying but when I saw the goose-egg I was concerned and in need of ice. I lamented the fact that we have none in the house and Chloe ran down the hallway only to reappear a few seconds later with a bag of frozen peas in hand and a triumphant look on her face. It really was a life saver. Out of all of my kids, Halle is the one that has had more bruises and owies than any other. I really hope she outgrows it. She did agree to let me take her picture though so I knew it wasn't *that* bad. Today it's just a bruise.

Here's the ginormous dumpster I talked about yesterday. And unfortunately it's still here today. I'm not sure when it's leaving. But I wanted to show you all Chloe's "crazy hair". All week there's been a celebration of Dr. Seuss and yesterday was Crazy Hair Day. We did it on Wednesday night because there's no way we'd have enough time to do it in the morning. She was really happy about it.

And from the back...cute, huh?

And look, I'm actually, really sewing. I don't remember if this is before or after the machine freaked out. I just came back from Wal-Mart with a seam ripper so I can finish the apron. I also got some really cute fabric from the $1.50 table for a couple of dresses for each of the girls and one for a skirt for me plus a pattern. I'm kind of scared to work on the skirt so I'll see how the kids dresses go first. If I don't think I can do it then I'll just make something for the girls out of the last fabric too. Trav is pretty wiped out from a really rough couple of weeks at work so I think I'm going to finish the-very-last-block for Kyleigh and the two aprons so that I can work on the dresses. I love starting projects but I really don't like finishing them. I get bored.

And lastly, here's our roof. It's not quite finished here but that's pretty much what it looks like- minus the ones hanging from the roof. It's actually even a little bit lighter than what it looks like here. Amanda doesn't like it and neither does Chloe and the jury is still out on whether Trav likes it or not. I think I like it- it's just really, really hard to pick a shingle from a tiny little square on a page. It's like picking a paint color from a swatch. Amanda thinks it makes the whole house look a bit too orange. I do wonder if painting the barn facade a different color would help. I've even thought about painting the brick. If we were going to live here another 5 years then I would but it's too big of a job and I really don't see us getting around to that.

Now I'm off to do some projects...

Apparently

2009-03-05T11:37:00.003-06:00

Apparently when you're getting a new roof and they tell you that they'll call you a couple of days beforehand to let you know they're coming it doesn't mean anything. Yesterday morning- out of the blue- I hear a knock at the door. Since I was not expecting a knock at the door I was shocked to find a guy that wanted to park a ginormous dumpster in my driveway. "Why" I asked? Well, for the new roof, of course. And this morning at 7 am two guys showed up and blocked my driveway with their truck. By the time I saw it they were already tearing my roof off so I had to ask them to move so I could take Chloe to school. Wow. A phone call would have been nice but that's OK because we're getting a new roof. And that means that we're one step closer to having this house finished. Sometimes you've just gotta keep things in perspective.

I'll blog more about this later-with pictures- because I just don't want to take the time to do it right now. But I wanted to post something because it's Thursday already. Anyway, my brain thinks it's spring. Despite the frigid temperatures we've had lately my brain will not be persuaded otherwise. Maybe it coincides with my watching Martha Stewart lately. I don't usually watch the whole show (it's actually on right now and I'm not watching) but it's my only cooking show fix. As best as I can tell, Foodnetwork.com only has a limited amount of full episodes and I'm dying for some new cooking ideas. So my brain has been doing flip-flops with all of the things I'm dying to make- caramel (my body's disdain for sugar is the only reason I haven't made it yet), a pillowcase dress (I'm making myself finish two other projects first), finishing the aprons I started last week, etc. Actually, I finished the apron last night but I decided to make straps for them instead of using grossgrain ribbon. The first strap was easy-peasy and turned out just fine but my machine flipped out on the second one and I had a hard time getting it going again. Then I finished the apron but sewed the pocket for the strap too small so I'm going to have to go buy a seam ripper and do that part over. I like the strap for the apron much better than the ribbon because I think it's a little more durable and will be less likely to just slip out. All-in-all I'm enjoying sewing and when my sewing machine flips out it doesn't bother me like it used to. Now I'm off but I promise I'll have pics of a new roof and some sewing projects soon.

Homework for Me

2009-03-02T15:25:00.004-06:00

This past weekend was, thankfully, a productive and fun one. We didn't get everything finished that we wanted to but we got some projects finished that we'd needed to for a while. And some things that aren't projects but that I'd promised to do. Like taking Chloe to Panera- just she and I. Panera is her most favorite place because, being the carb-a-holic that she is, she *loves* bagels. The pink ribbon bagel is her favorite (mostly because it has the word "pink" in it) followed by the cinnamon crunch bagel. But unfortunately they had neither. You'd think they'd make more of those on a Saturday. We had a lovely conversation and yummy food and we named a new drink. You see, Chloe loves making things called "concoctions". Travis started it when she was old enough to talk and while I prefer one beverage at a time, they prefer to make mixes. On this particular day she was engrossed in an orange scone so I decided to get the drinks. I asked her if she wanted me to surprise her and she said "sure". So I filled her cup half full of fruit punch and half with Mountain Dew. And while it won't win any gourmet awards, it turned out surprisingly pretty. Pinkish red on the bottom, lighter pink in the middle and orangey on top- just like a sunset. So she named it "Florida Sunset". Now there's probably a drink out there called "Florida Sunset" but since I don't think it will end up on any menus, I don't think we're in any danger of copyright infringement. But it was lots of fun for us. Then it was on to Target for some necessities- if that's what we're calling them these days. The two of us in Target is dangerous. Later Trav and I had a date night that was more like errand running for things we had to do the next day, but at least it was just the two of us.

Sunday was filled with snow and church. We didn't actually get to play in the snow and it was melted by the time we got out of church but it was pretty anyway. And it was March 1st. I hate to be a grump about it but I'm ready for shorts now, thanks. Then it was more errand running. I don't really like braving Costco on a Sunday afternoon but it's easier for me to stock up on things if Travis is with me. Then to Publix, then home...for more stuff.

So, you know when a teacher assigns a project for a second grader, it's really homework for mom, right? Not that it was terribly difficult, it wasn't. We actually had a really good time with it. She had a list of things she could pick from and we picked a diorama. I figured that stage fright might kick in if she wrote a song or poem, besides this is right up her alley. Her book was on horses and we were able to find a tube of different kinds of horses at Target for about $5. Along with that I picked up a pack of craft/scrap booking paper that seemed promising, so for about $8 we had everything we needed. Except for a darn glue gun. I have 2 glue guns already because I like to make wreaths sometimes. But I could not find them anywhere so I had to pick one up at Wal-Mart on the previously mentioned date night. But I also found out on Friday that Chloe had been picked as star of the week, which meant that I had to make a poster of things about Chloe and send in some other items. And it was all due by Monday. Darn me and my procrastination- I could have had the diorama finished already. So we had to make a diorama and a poster last night. I took about 3 1/2 hours but it all turned out nicely and I had one happy second grader.

While Chloe and I were busy making crafty things, Travis was at Home Depot getting boards to make bunky boards for the girls beds. Basically he had a two boards cut to size and then stapled some old sheets to the visible side so you wouldn't just see plain plywood. It was easy peasy- he did it himself- and we saved about $55 over buying bunky boards at a furniture store. He also picked up a shingle swatch thing. I'm not sure what you call it but it's just like swatches of paint that you pick up in the paint dept. We're getting a new roof and when I met with the roofing guy last week he asked me what color I wanted the shingles to be. Color? You mean I get to pick a color? I've never even thought about it. But considering that my house is an orange-y brick, the charcoal-black color that's on there doesn't really look that good. So we picked Golden Cedar. It's brown and cream with some orange-y specks in it. Not that you'll be able to tell at all- but it will still look nicer than black.

And, OK, just for giggles, aren't these eggs too funny? While we were at Publix I realized that I'd forgotten to get eggs at Costco. I wanted an 18 pack of Eggland's Best but they didn't have any and I saw these and was instantly confused. It took me a minute to figure out that these were, in fact, Disney brand eggs. It's marketed on the outside with a blurb that says "See your pals inside" and sure enough there were 18 eggs stamped with Pooh, Ariel, Cinderella, Woody, Buzz and Tigger. I rolled my eyes but the girls were jumping and begging for Disney eggs. Since they didn't' cost any more and seemed to be the equivalent of Eggland's Best, Trav and I decided to get them. Even as I was putting them in the cart I was saying "this is ridiculous". But Halle begged for a "Mickey egg" this morning. I guess if it gets them to eat more eggs it's OK. The ink comes right off when you boil them though.

And lastly- see the table runner that the eggs are sitting on? I've wanted this table runner for-ev-er but didn't want to spend $17.99 at Target. It's kind of a rule of mine that I only buy them when they're on clearance. I've gotten too many for $2 to consider paying full price. So here you go for about $4.50 I have a new table runner. Nice.

Finished

2009-02-27T10:35:00.004-06:00

Today I feel *fabulous*! It was one week ago that I got up in the morning and decided that moving around probably wasn't going to be in the cards for me. And it wasn't- for the next few days. But I'm feeling better now and have already had a productive day. We were out of groceries-like seriously scrounging around for food. So I dropped Chloe off at school (um, maybe just a wee bit late) and Halle and I went to Publix and bought a ton of food. Now it's put away and I need to do the 18 loads of laundry that have piled up since I was sick. I thought about working out today but I know that Trav will be most displeased if I do- so I won't. There's plenty of housework to catch up on anyway.

So last night, for the first time in a loooonnnggg time, I went to a sewing party! I don't think they're called sewing parties anymore though. I think we're supposed to party less and sew more. This week's project was a child's apron and I was determined to make one. I hadn't actually seen Travis since Tuesday because he worked way too late on Wednesday but I was still determined to go. But I forgot about a snack- like, I should bring one. So I stopped in Publix and picked up some pineapple (fabulous for a girl that's not supposed to have baked goods) and decided I must have a latte. So I dashed across the parking lot to Starbuck's. Sugar free, hazelnut latte, mmmmmm. Then I headed north, just me, Michael Buble' and my latte. No fighting kiddos- it was heaven. Until I hit a traffic jam- drat. Thankfully it didn't last too long and I was only about 10 minutes later than I would have been if I only got a coffee. That's my way of saying I would have still been a little bit late.

When I did arrive Mary was there, of course, and Amber (I've known her as long as we've lived here) and another Amber. Mary, Amber and I caught up and I realized how much I've missed hanging out with them. Sigh. It's easy to take people for granted when you live close by. We chatted and ate pineapple, some amazing toasted ravioli that Mary made- I wish I'd been able to eat more of those- darn IR- and I had a spoonful of Amber's cake batter ice cream. I'm telling the complete truth when I tell you that stuff is crazy good. It will kill you but at least you'll die with a smile on your face- wowza!

Then I made an apron. I actually, really finished a sewing project at a sewing party. I used to go just to eat and talk. And I made this little apron for someone special. It's kind of a surprise so I won't tell who it's going to but I have another one to make just like it that didn't get finished last night.

This is the side with the pocket. If you couldn't tell, this one is for a boy and I figured that boys like pockets, right? I'm not sold on the brown grossgrain ribbon that I used- actually I'm not even sure if it's grossgrain. It seems to be a little bit more fragile than that. I have an idea but I'm not sure if it will work. If it does I'll show you.

And it's reversible! It wasn't my idea but it's a good one. I love this fabric and would have put the pocket on this side but my lines are all crooked and it shows much more on the light blue fabric so if I was going to do a contrasting pocket it wouldn't look very good. I didn't notice that my feet were in this picture until later...not fixing it.

So I guess I can sew at least a little. It turns out that my problem has been the bobbin and when I quit freaking out about it I was able to fix it pretty easily. All in all it was a great night and I'm looking forward to next time. Although it won't just be me time since I've promised Chloe that she can go with me. That should be fun too though.

Operation BDHQ

2009-02-26T12:53:00.003-06:00

My dear friends Eric and Tisra have been on a very long adoption journey. But now they're nearing the end and have a precious little face and name to go along with the little one they've been dreaming about for the past few years. Her name is Dorothy and they're praying to be able to pick her up from her orphanage this summer. We're praying with them and if you click on her button it will take you to the site where they're raising funds to be able to complete the adoption and also to donate to Shaohanna's Hope to help other families with their dream of adoption. There are lots of fantastic prizes and several ways to be entered. So sign up and pray with me for sweet little Dorothy to be home with her family soon.

A Few of My Favorite Things...

2009-02-25T11:11:00.004-06:00

I did a post a few years ago (have I been blogging *that* long) that listed a few things that I really like and I thought that maybe it's time to do one again. Mainly because it's fun :)

About a week and a half ago- the day Chloe's flu really started- she convinced me that she was feeling just fine and was absolutely well enough to go to the mall. So we went and all of the spring merchandise is out so we squealed and said 'isn't that the cutest thing' about 500 times. If you don't have daughters of your own you should borrow mine for a while because it really is fun to shop with them. But we headed into Body Shop to look for a little thing that I'll list later but what we stumbled upon was their Hemp Hand Protector! OK, I'm not a hippie and I've never owned or desired anything made out of hemp but I tried it and it is incredibly fabulous! It smells, well, earthy but not like patchouli- which I don't like- it's more subtle. Amanda says it smells like pot and it scares me to think that she knows what that smells like. But she did go to public high school. I bought it for Travis because he has seriously dry skin, but I haven't let him take it to work. It's on sale right now for $9 so I might have to buy another tube. And as an added bonus there's *no petrolatum products* in this product. I asked the sales girl if their products were petrolatum free and she didn't know so I can't say for sure that all of their products are.

Number two on my list is an oil burner. I bought one a couple of Christmases ago with a gift card that Amanda bought for me and I've loved it. Why? Because it works infinitely better than candles; it can even be overpowering at times in my little house. But since I have 3 cats (I can't stand the smell) I don't mind an overpowering *good* smell. You can get the burners pretty much anywhere but the oils tend to be a little pricey- $7.50 for .3 ounce. I bought Satsuma because Travis has wanted it forever and the orange smell is amazing. I find that Bath and Body works has the best deals though because they'll offer their oils for $3- I get their e-mails and stock up. I also find that cinnamon-ey smells last the longest. And any of their seasonal fragrances are fantastic- "A Perfect Autumn", "A Perfect Christmas", etc. What I don't think works all that well are their Scentport plug in type things- unless you buy two of them. I have one Scentport and one Wallflower- because I had a coupon for each and they were free or next to free- and they work well when you have the same fragrance in each. If you're at all interested in their stuff you should sign up for their e-mails, you get quite a lot of good deals. One time I bought about $40 worth of stuff for $12. I just signed up for Body Shop's e-mail so I don't know what kind of deals you get there.

Yankee Candle. I love it there. I dated a guy once (the one right before Travis) and he was allergic to everything. He started sneezing every time we went into that store- it would have never worked. I think I've mentioned before that Cranberry Chutney is my absolute fave but by this time in the year I'm looking for something a bit more springy. So on Valentine's Day as part of our date, Trav and I went to Yankee candle- because I had a buy 1 get one free for their jar candles. Yay! He'd already decided that he wanted Vanilla and lime but I don't really like it that much and this was my Valentine's Day present. So I decided that I'd pick one and he'd pick one and we'd compromise. We smelled every candle in the store, as usual, and I picked up Starfruit and Orange for the very first time. It smelled heavenly. More importantly it smelled Florida-esque so I was hooked. And Travis picked Mandarin Cranberry, still yummy although not as strong as what I picked out. Last time I bought a candle, I bought the slightly more modern looking jar with two wicks and the metal lid but two wicks just burn the candle a lot faster so I went with the more country looking jar.

I'm sure I stumbled across these Blumebuds by someone else's blog a while back so if it was yours then I'm sorry. But aren't these just the cutest little things? I've never actually done place cards before, mostly because I never have enough seats when I have people over. One day though, I'll have enough room and when I do I'll be happy I saved this little idea.

I also love this- how cool is it to make your own clock? I've seen the clock making kits at Joann's and I have plenty of canvases so it seems like it would be easy peasy to have a piece of art that's all you and tells time too. Fun.

(Edited to add)

And last but not least- caffeinated eye cream to get rid of puffiness. I was skeptical when I first heard about it but figured it was worth a try for those days when I haven't had enough sleep. I read about Moxie's Double Shot eye cream for men and Garnier's Eye Cream. Since Garnier's is easier to get (Wal-Mart) and the price is only about $13 I tried that one. I have to say I was pleasantly surprised. It's easy to put on and if you apply it repeatedly when you're really puffy it does help. It's supposed to help with dark circles over time but I really can't remember to use it every day.

Alright, I think that's enough for today. I still have tons of things floating around in my brain but I think I've been sitting here for about an hour now- I should check in on Halle.

Back...To Randomness

2009-02-24T19:14:00.003-06:00

OK, I'm back. From where you ask? The flu- that's where I'm back from. Yes, I get sick quite often but I'm encouraged because I'm not getting sick as much as I have. I actually went four whole weeks without getting sick at all- nearly the entire month of January! And I'm bouncing back from this nicely. My fever is down and I put makeup on and went out of the house for the first time today. I took Chloe to the Dr. because she's been sick for over a week too. She had the flu and I'm pretty sure that's where I got it. She's missed five days of school but the Dr. said that she's OK to go back. She's only 7 but the makeup work isn't anything to sneeze at, plus she has her very first project due next Monday. Please don't get me started on a 2nd grader doing projects.

So while we were at the Dr. we noticed that a new kids consignment store opened next door. I was actually somewhat impressed with the clothes and the prices so I think I'll go back when I run errands on Friday. If any of you are interested, it's right behind Costco. The girls were impressed too which was evidenced by the eardrum piercing squeals coming from the two of them. It's amazing the pitches those little bodies can produce.

Then we ran to Blockbuster and Publix and the Factory. One of those was a necessity- I'll let you figure out which one. They're having a consignment sale at the Factory and I wanted to see how long it was going on and what the clothes were like. I haven't really been to one of those before but I wasn't really impressed. It seemed kind of like a trumped up garage sale. It wasn't dirty- in fact everything smelled of fabric softener- but maybe it's just not my thing.

Rewinding a few days- I'm not sure how many because I could barely get out of bed since Friday...Travis brought home a Michael Buble' CD for me! I haven't listened to it all the way through yet but I know I'm going to love it. I recently wrote 25 things about me on Facebook (because none of you have heard of that, right?) and one of them is that even though I have a music degree, I'm shamefully ignorant of popular music. See, I haven't put music on the priority list of things to buy because everything else comes first. But I watched a video clip of Christy's son Drew play the euphonium and felt all giddy and happy inside and realized that I've let a huge part of me die. So I decided to do something about it. I remembered Kris talk about Pandora a couple of months back and decided to jump in. I've actually always been a bit clueless about popular music because I wasn't allowed to listen to "secular" music when I was growing up. I never really decided what I liked because I just listened to whatever my friends listened to when we were together or contraband Q105- *before* it was a country station. Then it was whatever music that whatever guy I was dating listened to. Gangster rap (hangs head in shame), Eric Clapton, Classical (he was a much better choice), New Age, Alternative (garage band)...you get the idea. The only artist I was sure I liked was Bon Jovi- I still like Bon Jovi. See Travis doesn't really make music a priority. Probably because he likes '80's Christian Rock and I hate it. I mean, I liked it in the '80's. Who didn't *love* Petra? Or Whiteheart? But I don't love it now. I love jazz and guys like Michael Buble' and Harry Connick Jr. Apparently I like Coldplay too- Amanda says everybody does. So I said all that to say that I'm taking suggestions. Who do you guys love? I know I love James Blunt- acoustic guitar and vocalist. But other than that I think (except for country and death metal) I'm an open book. I think this will be fun.

You Know It's Got To Be Good...

2009-02-19T20:00:00.005-06:00

...if you start out with this much butter. I have to admit I've been in a colossal rut lately. I haven't felt inspired to do much. I haven't felt like cleaning or creating or cooking. Well, I did in theory but everything just felt like too much of a chore. " I don't feel like rolling out sugar cookies...I can't eat them anyway...Alfredo sauce takes too long...we'll just do leftovers". You get the idea. I had a bit of a feeling sorry for myself breakdown today and the Lord just sort of intervened and made some things stand out to me that I hadn't thought about. Like the new quote on the sidebar. I used to dream of owning a house and all I can see are unfinished projects and ugliness, a lack of counter space and less than stellar appliances. I've felt lost and unfulfilled and have found myself saying that 'this isn't what I prepared for, this isn't what I saw myself doing with my life'. But if I were doing something else I'd be missing it. I'd be missing my girls growing up and sharing life with them. So, with some help, I got things into gear. This is my job- and it's a really important one, so I should get on with it.

A few months back Christy linked to this wonderful apricot tart and I read that post again drooling over its yumminess. That tart wasn't in the cards because I determined that I was only going to use ingredients in the house for dinner but it lead me to a pie crust recipe which gave me the inspiration for chicken pot pie tonight. In the past I've made it with just a Bisquick biscuit top and my whole family loves it. But it doesn't have that great homemade flavor plus it has hydrogenated oil in it so I don't use it anymore. It was my very first time to make a pie crust and I haven't done it before because I thought it would be too difficult- but I was so wrong. Not only is it easy, it seems to be idiot proof too- long story. And even though it was my first attempt at making a pie crust I decided to do a 50/50 blend of whole wheat flour and white flour. It turned out perfectly. It was still buttery and flaky and delicious. I think it would make a great crust for apple pie or anything else you could possibly make with a crust. I really didn't even have the right veggies but I improvised with peas, corn, spinach and black-eyed peas- about 3.5 pounds of veggies for two pies. You have to feel good about that. Plus chicken breast. If it weren't for all the butter in the crust it would be totally healthy. But as it is you aren't eating *that* much crust since I only put it on the top.

I decided for a nice little surprise, I'd use some teensy butterfly and flower cookie cutters that I bought forever ago ($5 at Ross- score!) to top the pie.
Then I left the room for a minute and the girls decided to surprise me back. See how thick some of the cutouts are?

They begged to be able to roll out the dough too. I figured that they couldn't make *that* much of a mess so I let them... And they loved it. They were all smiles and didn't want to stop playing with it all to eat dinner.

But it all turned out very nicely and I felt happy and fulfilled. The girls were all smiles and they scarfed down the dinner that they "helped" make. I need to really tweak the filling because I wasn't totally happy with that but, whatever, next time...

La-de-da

2009-02-16T20:00:00.003-06:00

This past weekend was a pretty eventful one. Valentine's Day was low-key and that's fine with me. When I was a kid Valentine's Day usually involved a heart shaped box of chocolates and a stuffed animal of some sort. My parents probably went out for dinner, but I can't remember. And I find that the holidays that weren't huge at my house when I was younger, usually isn't as big of a deal at the Button casa. Trav and I had a few hours out but it was kind of lame on the Ooh and Ahh-o-meter. I don't really mind lame things that much usually and had a great time just being out.

Amanda had a big thing though. She auditioned for an acting thing and was invited to go to a super-big, high-falutin' acting thing in June- in Orlando! Apparently this is *the place* to meet agents and directors and such that you could not get an audience with otherwise. She prayed about it and we prayed about it and even though the cost is going to be really, really high, we know that this is the thing she's supposed to do. So my daughter has dropped out of college to become an actor...and I'm encouraging it. Funny.

Oh, and you probably should know that the insurance adjuster came out this morning and said that we do, in fact, need a new roof that they will be mostly paying for. The window guy came out this morning and installed a new window in our bedroom- finally. I can actually see Westhaven from my window now. Trav's van is fixed- and it took amazingly little money to fix it. And I'm thankful.

So on to the crafty stuff. I've finished block #2 of Kyleigh's- sans bells. I watched Holiday Inn last night while I was hand-stitching it and forgot to put the bells in. Which I was reminded of by Halle, Travis and Amanda. Bummer.

And I decided to go a different direction with one of those frames I bought. I mixed a little bit of white artist acrylic paint (the amount shown was *way* too much) with a really wet brush and brushed it over the frame. Easy peasy.

The watered down paint pooled nicely in the grooves while still coating a lot of the frame itself.

Then I took the black ribbon off and switched it for this nice brown and blue one. Beachy, no? Ignore the palm tree-ish things inside. It was an experiment with masking fluid gone awry. I'm pretty sure that I can do better than that, which is why I haven't let Travis take this one to work.

And just for giggles, here's a shot of the gutter that was blown off the house. If you look closely you can see a shingle stuck in the bushes. That was some wind we had last week, wasn't it? When that nasty rain storm that was part of it came through our area I was stuck in car line waiting for Chloe. I got a bit nervous at one point and was thinking about tornadoes, not realizing that the school had apparently gotten some sort of tornado warning. I probably should have turned the radio on. But I was busy reading my very first issue of Coastal Living- and I love it.

Oh, and one more tidbit before I sign off. If you have time you should totally take this quiz. Yes, it's another one about style but I really liked it. I scored 33% Nantucket Style, 33% Cottage Chic and 34% Modern Elegance. I thought it pretty much nailed the looks that I really like. So have fun with that one. I didn't think I had much to write about but sometimes once I get started I just don't stop. So I'll stop now.

From Zero to Discouraged in 2.4 Seconds

2009-02-12T11:15:00.004-06:00

My mind has been swirling since last night about what to write today. Sometimes it's just hard to get the thoughts going but I'll do my best. Trav and I have been through a lot in the last several years (I think I've heard that somewhere before) and it has become clear to me that it has been a faith building exercise. Maybe one day I'll outline my argument for God bringing hard times into your life. Yes, I believe that even though it flies in the face of several mainline denominations stance on, well, God. That God is all flowers and sunshine and would never, ever want us to go through anything remotely difficult much less make them difficult for us. Even though all throughout the old testament God tells Moses that He is testing the Israelites. But I'm not talking about that today because I haven't formulated my whole stance on it. And if you're going to make an argument like that you have to be able to defend it. Moving on.

Faith. We've come a long way since we first moved here and I was hyperventilating because we couldn't pay our bills. Seriously, hyperventilating. That's how terrifying it was to me. It's now several years later and I can see impending doom- like our mortgage about to adjust to a higher rate that we cannot afford to pay- and say, eh. OK, whatever, God will either a). make a way for us to refinance this thing or b). He'll make a way for us to pay the higher payment or c). we'll lose our house. C) sounds bad but at least I wouldn't have to put a new bathroom in it. I'm kidding. But throughout that whole refinancing process I barely batted an eye, didn't even come remotely close to worrying, and never, ever lost a night's sleep in the process. Even though we talked to several mortgage people that said they couldn't help. I was faced with losing my house and it did not move me.

Now, lest you think I'm bragging I'll fast forward to Tuesday (or rewind- whichever way you want to look at it). Travis car has pretty much died. The tires are completely worn out, it doesn't always shift into gear so sometimes he has to turn it off and then on again *while he's driving on the interstate*! And the less important thing is that it's 14 years old and smells like dirty feet- it used to be my dad's work van- and has no A/C. So Tuesday, we're praying and figuring, figuring, figuring and came to the conclusion that we cannot buy another car. It would make things too tight. Like miserably tight. Then I took a quick trip to the bank and a guy was hitchhiking in my neighborhood. I wasn't about to stop and pick him up and drove past him. He apparently didn't like that and swung at my van and started yelling at me. Earlier when I was in car line waiting for Chloe two things came to me 1. was that God had this all worked out and 2. was a really, really bad feeling. The bad feeling left after I didn't pick that guy up. But it was enough to knock the wind out of my sails and make me want to curl up in bed and cry.

Wednesday I woke up feeling better and then during the wind storm (?) one of our gutters blew off and exposed some rotting on the roof line and some shingles have been blown off. So Trav and I started talking about what the insurance company might do and whatever it is there is a $1,000 dollar deductible and blah, blah, blah and immediately my mood went to discouraged and my thoughts to "I can't take this anymore". Yes, I had two crummy days. Two crummy days that I wasn't expecting which led to my humanity taking over instead of faith rising up to say "God has this too". I'm not beating myself up or anything like that. My thoughts are just that in some circumstances- apparently the far off things that I can see- I can say, 'no problem, God will take care of it, I'm not worried'. And the surprises make me depressed and I want to curl up in bed and cry.

We were scheduled to lead worship for Life Group last night and when I was praying all week I felt a sense of diving purpose for us in that. As I sang through the first song I felt like I needed to share all of that and went into the second song not even thinking about what song it was. After the first verse I started sharing all of this that I've just shared with you and declared that my crummy mood wasn't going to affect my worship to the creator of the universe. Then I realized what the song was- Mighty to Save. "Saviour, He can move the mountains, my God is mighty to save, mighty to save". We picked that song weeks ago and I was singing it and not even thinking about it but God knew.

Later, we broke up into small groups of three and since I'd shared about my crummy two days one of the ladies said, "OK, so what's wrong" and I shared about my awful, crummy, blah, blah, blah. But I also shared about being called to go back home and how it came about and I was so surprised that they were really interested and cared and were excited for me. Then we continued to talk and I found out that this same person was facing really tough financial times too and she had the same questions I had at the beginning of our whole journey. "Why is this happening? Am I sinning? It isn't supposed to be this way"! And I was able to share with her a little bit about it building faith and that it's a season, not forever, even though it feels that way. Then we talked to the couple that host life group and we were able to talk about being called home and he was really encouraging and seemed happy for us and I can't even tell you how much it means to me to be able to talk about it. Because I'm excited and am looking forward to God fulfilling that in our lives.

Then on the way home, we stopped at our former life group leaders house to pick up Amanda (we left and she stayed) and both of our former leaders came out and talked to the little kiddos and hugged us and told us how much they missed us. And Marianne talked on and on about how precious Amanda is and how much God has done in her life in the last few months and how much she loves her. Then she talked about how exciting it is that God has called us home and was so happy for us. And I was able to tell her what was in my heart and that I feel like God has restoration in store for our family. Which she said was exactly what Pastor Dale is talking about right now.

When we left their house I was so very encouraged and excited about everything that God had done. Yes, the other stuff is still there but whatever. We'll figure it out, God has is under control and there's no reason for me to worry and be depressed. So yes, I can go from zero to discouraged in 2.4 seconds but God is there to meet me in those times because he loves me so much. He's not condemning but is there to encourage me and to give me a big hug through his people. And I am very thankful.

Check Out the Dollar Bin!

2009-02-05T21:42:00.004-06:00

I usually try to run past the dollar bins at Target because I really don't need any more junk at my house. And technically these are from the $2.50 bin but aren't they sweet? A pack of 3 frames with glass fronts that hang on little ribbons *and* you can paint them whatever color you want. You could also change out the ribbon or just hang them with nails from the metal hooks on the back. I painted a little bird but a piece of cute wallpaper, greeting card or wrapping paper would work too. I painted the frame black with some artist acrylics I had lying around but, again, you could use anything you have at home. You might want to hurry though since the stuff in the dollar bins don't usually last long. Happy crafting!

20% Country! Seriously?

2009-02-05T13:07:00.002-06:00

You have to take this quiz. I found it at How About Orange. Remember how I told you I was design schizophrenic because I like nearly everything? Well apparently I'm 40% modern (which will come as a great relief to my husband), 40% Scandinavian (really?) and 20% country (bummer). Which I'm pretty sure gives me license to be 100% Amy. I'm OK with that.

Miss Mary

2009-02-05T12:35:00.002-06:00

At the beginning of last year Mary had a great little pay it forward crafting idea which I signed up for. I'd actually forgotten about it until she reminded me last week, so imagine my surprise when this beautiful scarf landed in my mailbox last week. Isn't it beautiful? And the kicker is that it's made of *bamboo*! I didn't even realize that they made yarn out of bamboo but it seriously is the softest most yummy yarn ever. And since it's been so cold it has been my constant companion for the past few days. I haven't actually owned a scarf since we've lived here. I haven't really needed one in the last few years because there have only been a few weeks that it's been really, really cold...but we all know what this winter has been like. I think it looks smashing with my black pea coat. Thank you Mary.

That picture was taken a couple of days ago with my "old" hair. I just came back from the salon and it was heavenly. I used to go to Fantastic Sam's because of budget constraints but I was really, really tired of bad haircuts. And since I only go about every 4 months I figured we could fit it in. The salon has recently remodeled and now they have chairs that give you a massage while they wash your hair...heaven. I didn't take a picture because unlike Christy, I stick with the same haircut pretty much every time. I've tried different styles, really, but it always ends up bad. My hair is really fine and I have a strong jaw so long and straight is the only thing that works for me. After the salon, I got a cup of coffee at Merridee's. It was just coffee. Not a latte, or mocha anything- coffee. I suppose I should add that I tried Jamaican me Crazy but it was still coffee. It was good though not strong enough for me. I don't have to have coffee every day, I don't want it every day but I am really starting to enjoy it.

And see the cutesy picture that I bought at Target last night? I've wanted a dandelion something for a long time and believe it or not they're incredibly hard for me to paint. I've tried. This isn't really a painting, it's canvas but more like a furniture canvas that's colored- not painted- with the dandelions screen printed on or something like that. It reminds me of an iron-on shirt. But it's cute and it was on sale for $10- yay! Their whole furniture event that they have once a year is 50% off right now and they have some pretty cute stuff.

Ooh, and my sewing machine isn't broken! Apparently I inadvertently pulled out a knob on the side and that's what made it quit working. I'm so glad Travis looks for the simple thing first. So it's back to making blocks today. I almost headed over to Hobby Lobby to get some new fabric but decided I'm not buying another scrap of fabric until I finish what I'm working on. I'd like to get Kyleigh her blocks before her first birthday...sheesh.

Getting Crafty

2009-02-03T11:20:00.005-06:00

I have been bored beyond belief lately. And it's not that I don't have anything to do, I just haven't wanted to do it. I'm so burned out on home improvement projects that the thought of picking up a paintbrush makes me feel ill. So I decided that the girls and I needed a crafty pick-me-up. I saw and idea for a Valentine's Day garland on Ms. Tee's site and thought it looked easy and inexpensive enough to work. All you need is pipe cleaners and something to clip them with- I used pliers- and we were off. Actually it was so easy that the kids kicked me out of it and did it completely by themselves. Chloe was clipping the pipe cleaners and they made hearts like mad. But it didn't stop there, oh no. The kids went heart crazy making a heart and other things out of every-single-pipe cleaner (I think they're called chenille stems or something like that now). I haven't taken a picture of the garland but it looks just like the one on Ms. Tee's site that I linked to.

Chloe had other ideas in mind though. Like this swirly-whirly heart.

And a baseball cap...

I've always known that Chloe was creative but this really surprised me. I would never have thought of that. And the time has finally come for me to finish miss Kyleigh's blocks. Sickness and home improvement projects distracted me along with a messed up sewing machine, so I finally just sewed this one up by hand. My mom brought a newer, better sewing machine to me a few months ago and Travis put it away and I couldn't find it. I had decided that I just can't sew with one so I hadn't tried to use the new one. But after holding my left hand in an incredibly awkward position to sew this one up I decided I try the machine again. And it worked! Until I broke it. I was nearly done with the second one last night and the machine just quit working. It sounds like a belt broke or slipped off or something. So I guess I'm back to sewing by hand. Travis is going to try to fix it for me. It serves me right I guess. While it was working I had grandiose dreams of making a hobo bag that I've seen and a little butterfly t-shirt for the kiddos and an apron and all sorts of things but I suppose it's not meant to be...yet. Oh, and my grandma's quilt. I think I just need to put a back on it and some batting? I don't even know where to start. It seems like a nice ongoing project to work on after the kiddos go to bed. And I have an idea for another painting and on and on...

So I guess the creative kick-start worked...

Finally Outside

2009-02-01T19:30:00.005-06:00

What a beautiful weekend. I was finally able to take the kiddos outside because the temperature was finally in the 50's. The botanical garden in Nashville was offering a $1 admission for the month of January and since I was a work widow Travis encouraged me to take the girls. I'd wanted to go since we've lived here but the admission always seemed too steep considering I'd been able to take Amanda to Bok Tower Gardens for a couple bucks a piece several years ago. Although they've raised their prices considerably since then. Anyway, most anything is expensive when your family multiplies to five.

It's pretty obvious though why they'd offer reduced admission in January- nearly everything is dormant and it's usually pretty darn cold. But the sun was shining and we really only needed light jackets to enjoy the day. The grounds were still pretty although the grass is brown and there were no leaves on the trees. Just the opportunity to get outside was enough. The garden used to be the estate of the family that was part of Maxwell House coffee and it is expansive. The old mansion itself is 30,ooo square feet and now houses the museum. We saw lots of interesting art, the scholastic series is on display right now which is by students all over this area. That was a little disappointing *but* I got butterflies in my stomach when I realized that they had a Faberge' exhibit! It was very impressive. I've never been to a prestigious museum but this was nice. I wasn't allowed to take pictures although I saw a couple of people brazenly carrying around cameras and snapping photos. All in all it was a wonderful day and I'd like to go back when things are blooming.

Here's Chloe with a statue of a 19th century woman as Sphinx. I wondered how she'd actually do her hair and put on that lovely dress with those claws. The kiddos in the herb garden. I liked the twisty-ness of the grape vines and the shadows.This is part of the mansion's garden.The japanese garden.
The kiddos...When I walked into the seasonal garden I gasped. The red berries was a huge contrast to the evergreen, brown grass and leaf-less trees. I'd love to have one of these trees but for the life of me I can't remember what their called. It seems like it was a "paw-paw" something. I'm probably remembering it wrong.

Just a Couple More...

2009-01-27T15:54:00.004-06:00

I did get a better shot of the windows last night, see? I usually don't leave the curtains open at night but I couldn't really bring myself to close them. They look so pretty and new. So new in fact, that I see I'm going to have to paint the exterior parts of the house that aren't brick- the barn facade thingy. Mary mentioned the lack of grids in the windows and I'm glad we don't have them either. I think it obscures the view. And you have to pay extra for them so it wasn't even a consideration.

I bought these cute little window clings the week before last at Target for a dollar in their dollar bin and Chloe wanted to wait until she got a new window in her room before she put them up. And she did last night, I think they're cute.

The whole process was easy peasy, by far the easiest home improvement to date. Of course, that's because we hired a professional and I'm so glad we did. I don't think we could have done it. We've read how to do it but 1. we don't have the tools 2. we're burned out beyond belief on house projects and 3. I'm afraid we would have gotten the window partially out and then had to call someone- and we know now that it takes weeks to get new windows. Besides being energy efficient they have some super- cool features, like being able to slide the screen to the top part of the window and open the window from the top. That way the cats can't get out and (as a friend pointed out this morning) your kids can't accidentally fall out the window either. All in all I'm pleased with the whole thing...except that the window for our master bedroom was the wrong size so Trav and I still have the old nasty window. Patience is a virtue I guess. When the installer told us we actually started laughing. Like really, really laughing. I don't think that was the response he expected.

There's something else I have to talk about though. I've been debating about it for a while and I just have to get it out. Travis read my posts and comments at Christmas time and he said that what I was saying didn't really match up with where my heart was in regards to FL and wanting to be there. I said I wanted to be home but I wasn't going to think about it. And at that point that's where I was- but I left out some details. It wasn't just about my wanting to be home or being homesick. I should probably mention that I haven't been homesick since we've lived here. I'm sure I complained about Tennessee and the fact that I could drive 15 minutes in any direction and be in the sticks and the lack of things to do or the fact that any of the things that there are to do cost a lot. I haven't wanted to move back to FL in forever, I don't remember how long. It's been at least as long as we've lived in Franklin because I've loved Franklin so very much. It's like living in a Norman Rockwell painting except with traffic. In fact, when we went to FL for Amanda's graduation present (this past May) I realized that I hated everything about FL. I hated the pine trees and the cement block houses and the cockroaches (I swear, they're always in the bathtub) and the palmetto bushes. And the memories, I especially hated the memories, the bad stuff that happened to me there. And the whole time I was in college I wanted to run away. I wanted to be Amy without a past. To just be Amy.

Fast forward to the Friday before Christmas. I was getting ready for shopping and such since we'd been involved in church stuff and Travis had walking pneumonia and we just didn't have time to get ready for Christmas. But the whole day I had a gnawing in my gut and I couldn't really put my finger on what was going on. I went to the grocery store to get stuff for Christmas dinner and I just felt like God wasn't letting me buy anything. Yes, it sounds nuts and I thought so at the time. I went to the produce section and looked at the citrus and felt all sentimental and mushy over a bunch of tangerines. I thought I was losing it. And I bought some tangerines. And I started thinking that we could go home for Christmas. It was really short notice but we could pull it off. And the whole time I had a sense that it was time to go home. But not just for Christmas; it was time for us to go home. And I felt that the whole time we were there and it was hard to resolve all of that. But I didn't think about it all the time because we were too busy doing lots of stuff.

Anyway, I don't have a clear picture of what's going to happen. I'm at peace and turned upside down all at the same time. I want to be part of Newsong but the only thing that I think I know is that we're called to be with our family. I have no clues or details about how or when. I do know that our families on both sides are going through a lot of really hard things right now. I won't go into details on that. Our families have gone through lots of hard things since we've been gone and we haven't felt compelled to go back until now. In counting the cost of leaving, it's hard to think about. We have amazing friends that we love dearly. In reality though our two sets of friends are the only people that I'm close to. I've never felt at home at church (although I love it) or Life Group; I still feel like an outsider every time we go. We just refinanced a house that is probably 3 years out from being completely remodeled when I think about it realistically. And moving to another state is really hard even if you've lived there before- while getting a job is nearly impossible.

In praying I have heard the Lord say that I shouldn't fret about the process that he has every detail worked out. And I just have to trust that. I want to say that I'm not anxious to leave but if I'm going to be very honest I have to say that wanting to go home is this huge gnawing in my gut. I want to be home badly. I want to see restoration between my brother and me. I want to see restoration for my nephews and nieces. I want to see restoration for so much more that I can't really write about now. The fact is that our God is a restorer of things broken and I have seen so much devastation in my family and I know that God has in mind to fix it. I don't think that I can just waltz in and fix things that are broken, it's not my job, I just want to be there. I want to love my family unreservedly and somehow show them that and see God fix it.

I know that I do not have the power to make this come to pass. Our financial state is too fragile, our emotions too raw from 8 1/2 years of struggling. We're just starting to see the pieces of our family come back together; there is no way we can take something like this on in ourselves. God has to do it or it won't get done. So I wait. I'm kind of tired of waiting.

Things like this deserve a phone call- they do. But I can't. I can't do it again. I'm waiting for this thing that, I believe, is going to be wonderful all the while waiting to say goodbye again. To have my heart ripped out again....and I just can't. So I think that's it in a nutshell. I knew it would come pouring out eventually.

I Love the Sound of a Reciprocating Saw in the Morning....

2009-01-26T10:33:00.006-06:00

Today is *the* day! I got a phone call on Thursday telling me that my windows had come in and would I like to have them installed on Monday? She didn't have to ask me twice. And I tried my best to not answer "YES!" like a squealy little school girl that had just been asked to the prom by the school's star football player. So I said, "sure, Monday would be fine".

OK, so let's recap. We moved in here October of '06 full of excitement at all the fixing we'd do to our fixer-upper. You can find before photos here and here. If you've been reading for a while you know the really big projects we've tackled. But the whole time we've really, really, needed new windows. I've posted pictures of them before but just for giggles here are some more.

This is the window in the girl's room. You can see the condensation in between the panes. I've shown them frozen before but they're just cold all winter and really hot in the summer. If you touch the metal in the hot months when the sun is beating down on them you can actually burn your hand.

Pretty, huh?Here's the gaping hole in my kitchen...it was 30 degrees outside. My feet were cold but it's always cold in the house.

And presto, chang-o, we have a new window. It took him a lot longer to get the window out than it did to get the new one in. See the little blue cat prints? That happened the last time I painted. The cats love to sit up there but I don't think they're going to have room anymore since the new window is so much wider than the old one.

I'd like to get a better picture but it's actually kind of hard to get one. It's cloudy outside so the flash won't come on since the camera thinks I'm taking a picture of something outside.

Travis stayed home with me today and I'm very thankful. The installer seems very nice but the thought of me staying here all day with a guy I don't know made me uncomfortable. And, so, as a reward I made french toast with whipped cream and berries and bacon. I was going to make eggs too but he got full. It was nice to feel Martha Stewart-y this morning.

Mmmmmm...

Of Bunkbeds and Ice Formations

2009-01-20T16:11:00.005-06:00

Has it really been over a week since we set the bunkbeds up? I wanted to wait to post pictures until I got the girls bedding-which I did last week- and then I wanted their room to be perfect. And there have been a couple of times that their room has been perfect but I didn't take a picture so I just decided to take a picture and deal with it not being perfect. My parents got a Barbie townhouse for them for Christmas and they've been spending a lot of time playing with it.

So here they are. I like the color. I don't like it that the cats can scratch the finish on it. As you can see they've made it their new hangout.

And this is a sweet little side table that I bought for Chloe in October off of Craig's List. She needed something to put some books in and to put her water cup on at night. It hardly holds a fraction of her books though and I really needed something else. So yesterday I bought a 9 cube organizer for their room too in the same color as the bed. Target has them on sale in the store for $10 off (for that matter nearly everything in Target is on clearance right now). You can see a couple of toys peeking out from under her bed and that's because we've stored toys and books and bags of clothes under there for lack of any other place to put them. The cubes will allow us to store both and hopefully their room will be better organized. Yesterday Christy posted some envy inducing pictures of the beach so I thought I'd post some pretty, if not envy inducing, pics from the rocks behind Target.I'd kind of forgotten that the rocks get like this. It used to be a common sight when I drove on the interstate all the time but I rarely do now. I'm sick of the cold but they're still pretty.And I really hope we get our new windows soon. It's supposed to happen the first of February although I don't have an exact date yet. This shot is of moisture being frozen *between* the two panes of glass.

Days 4 & 5

2009-01-16T21:59:00.002-06:00

Day 4 of South Beach was so unremarkable that I actually kind of forgot about it. I ate what I was supposed to and I didn't really crave anything. Thinking back on the last time I did this, I remember that it's about the same. Although the first few days were harder. Does that make sense? I know what I'm thinking but it's not translating well. And today was fine. I even worked out on my bike for 48 minutes without much difficulty. While watching an episode of Psych- I really like that show. *But* a little bit ago I noticed I was hungry and ignored it. It's a habit from high school. My dad was always coming home with this idea or that from the Post Office (where he worked) and one that really stuck was not eating after 4PM. So the we'd eat early and that was it. Tonight I didn't think I should be hungry because I was full after dinner. Anyway, I got this bad familiar feeling of light headedness and was afraid that if I stood up I'd pass out. A few months back I got sick and didn't eat for the whole day because I couldn't and about 4am I felt sick and went through this process of feeling like I was dying or something and I did briefly pass out. Which is what tipped the Dr. off that something was wrong. Anyway, I'd like to avoid that again if at all possible so Travis quickly got some Orange Juice for me. Which is not on phase 1 of South Beach. And I followed it with a banana and string cheese.

I'm a little bummed but at least I didn't use it as an excuse to eat a candy bar. The medicine is going to affect everybody differently and I won't explain it all because it's boring. The jist of it is that the medicine makes my blood sugar drop because it's for diabetics. I don't have high blood sugar so I have to be careful. Anyway, as of right now I think that I'll either have to a) quit working out until I'm on phase 2 when I can eat fruit or b) keep working out and just be on phase 2 now. Either way I'm not eating sugar so I'm leaning toward phase 2 now since I seem to be healthy enough to work out and I'm tired of not exercising. We'll see how it goes.

Just Some Fun Stuff

2009-01-15T08:19:00.004-06:00

OK, so I finally did it. I have managed to stay awake after I got home from taking Chloe to school- I made a really big cup of coffee (thanks for the mug mom)- but I'm awake. I haven't done devotions yet but I will. I like being up when the house is quiet. I'm sorry for those of you with early risers. Anyway, I was reading my new Southern Living a couple of days ago and saw the cutest kitchen ever and thought I'd share it with you. You can find the whole article here. I'm not crazy about what they did with their living room but maybe you'll like it.

I don't know if I'd be gutsy enough to do this but isn't it fun? I love color, I think I get it from my dad. My mom has always (and I mean always) preferred browns and deep, rich colors while my dad prefers bright, bold in your face color. Now that I think about it, I love them all so I guess I get it from them. I was telling someone the other day that I think I'm design schizophrenic because I love almost everything and I could having a bit of nearly every style in my house. Except Queen Anne, I don't like that at all. I love the red island, I love the green cabinets, love the subway tile...Love the yellow cabinet with the coral chair...The only thing I'm not crazy about is this shade of orange on the built in desk. I'm not sure why. Maybe if it was coral like the chair...

So I hope you enjoyed this little mini-tour. Kudos to the home owners for going so big and bold. I think that in order to do something like this you'd have to be sure that you were going to stay in this house for a *long* time because of resale and such. Again, I'm not sure if I'd have the guts to do it and I get bored with colors pretty quickly because I always want to try another new color that I haven't used yet. Wouldn't a nice shade of green look good in my kitchen? I don't think I'll repaint again but I have thought about it.

Day 3

2009-01-14T21:36:00.002-06:00

It's day 3 of South Beach and I'm hating life. I really want some chocolate right now and a banana- covered in the aforementioned chocolate. And maybe some of that toffee that Christy gave us the recipe for. Can I just say that I think I look fine and I don't care about a diet and call it a draw? Travis said I can. I love my husband. Maybe I'll feel better about it in the morning.

Day 2

2009-01-13T17:05:00.002-06:00

It's day two and I'm not grouchy. I did Pilates today and I don't feel like I'm going to pass out. I had no coffee so I'm not jittery and I ate breakfast-even though it was only peanut butter. Lunch was leftover chili and I ate a string cheese and nuts as soon as I was done working out to avoid any crashing and grouchiness. And the only thing I'm craving is grapes and bananas and oranges and well, any fruit out there. Oh, and that salad mix from Costco with the candied almonds, feta cheese and cranberries sounds good too. I think I should probably go have a snack. So day two overall has been a big success and pretty easy. I think it's much easier since I've done this already.

Day 1

2009-01-13T10:41:00.002-06:00

So I finally did it. I started South Beach yesterday, for real. It turns out that my insight on my parents coming was right on the money. They brought presents (since we hadn't done Christmas with them yet) and mom baked cookies- chocolate chip cookies no less *and* white chocolate macadamia nut cookies. So I had chocolate chip cookies for breakfast and dinner. And we went to Shane's Rib Shack, a new restaurant for us, and they had the most amazing peach cobbler ever. So, yeah, starting a new diet before then would have been disastrous. We had a really good time and spent most of Saturday (after Travis picked up the correct box from the furniture store) at Opry Mills shopping. The sales were great and I picked up a bunch of new tops. I should have bought some shoes too but my wallet gets harder and harder to open the more money I spend. I hadn't really bought anything in forever so I was in need of some new things. My dad hates shopping but he was a really good sport.

The next day was church, the aforementioned Rib Shack lunch and saying goodbye. Then I cleaned the house and sold the old baby bed and box spring from Chloe's bed while Trav put together the new bunk bed. It was a long but productive day.

Yesterday, I cleaned and cleaned but was somehow stuck in neutral and didn't see much progress for all my labor. It was very frustrating. I really want to get out and look for new bedding for the kiddos. We've sort of picked out something at Target but I want to look a few other places and see if I can find anything else. I'll show you pictures when I do.

And just as a side note for me to remember my first day of South Beach. I skipped breakfast and drank way too much coffee so I was a bit jittery and irritable. I was hungry for most of the day even though I ate and wasn't really full until I had chili for dinner. Then I was fine. I didn't crave too much sweet stuff although a glass of real sweet tea and chocolate chips did call my name at one point. I resisted. The scale was down from normal by about a half pound but I didn't weigh yesterday so I'm not exactly sure what my starting point was- after all those cookies and peach cobbler. I'm so frustrated with weight loss in general that I thought this morning, "if it doesn't work this time, I'm done". I probably couldn't stick to that either but I've got my fingers crossed that with my new medicine I'll be successful this time.